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@Gurmeetramrahim congrtzz pyare papa ji .... #MSGdedicatesAwardToGuruji

@Gurmeetramrahim congratulations lovely father. #MSGdedicatesAwardToGuruji

naam hain dry state ka . .

there is a name for the dry state.

keep calm Salman bhaii....we r alwyzz wid uh...Salmania rockd...haters shockd....love uhhh bhai:-)

keep calm salman brother. we are always with you...Salmania rockd...haters shockd....love uhhh bhai:-)

@Ra_Bies but bhai, hamein toh loot liya milke husn walon ne kaale kaale baalon ne gore gore gaalon ne.

@Ra_Bies but brother, we have been robbed by the beauties, dark black hair, white cheeks

@AksharJi @neeerajbadhwar Shukriya

@AksharJi @neeerajbadhwar welcome

Sir #RightToPrivacy to sarkar ko bhi lagu hoti hain ....

sir #RightToPrivacy is also applicable for the government.

Or bhabi ji kaisi h hmri ☺☺☺

and how id our sister-in-law?

@Being_Humor Itna gaur Delhi wale ne farmaya hota to Vashi nahi pahaunchta.

if the delhiites had given so much attention, then vashi would not have reached.

@Stupidosaur zakhmon par namak mat ragad

@Stupidosaur do not rub salt on wounds

mujhe lagta hai ye baatein dil ki, hoti lafzon ki hai dhokbaazi.

i think these talking are heartbreaking, the words are a shock.

@Humor_DNA hahaa.. Hum bhi famous ho gaye

@Humor_DNA haha, we also got famous

@dhaval241086 mein to aajkal Sula Wine peeta hu.. Sasti sundar tikau.. aur nasha mbhi mast hota hai @BihariTweeter @Atheist_Krishna

@dhaval241086 I drink sula wine nowadays. it is inexpensive, beautiful, durable and addiction is also good. @BihariTweeter @Atheist_Krishna

WI tour pe jaane se achha Rishab Pant yahi rehkar #GST hi samjh leta itne dino me. #IndvsWI

It is better if Rishab Pant have stayed back here itself and understood #GST rather than going for WI tour. #IndvsWI

@Alllahdin ye kathor sachchai sirf Pinki ne accept kiya hai. #Respect

@Alllahdin Only Pinki has accepted this hard truth. #Respect

maa tho maa hoti hai . . love you

Mom will be mom . . love you

Main zindagi ka saath nibhata chala gayahttps://twitter.com/rafiology/status/890969561524191232 …

I have been living along with my life. https://twitter.com/rafiology/status/890969561524191232 …

@hitennarendra H-5 kahan hai?

@hitennarendra where is H-5?

Ek joke aapko jokhim mein daal sakta hai.

one joke can put you at risk.

Beshak Main aaj bhi pheke hue paise nahin uthata Unless it ' s a #BitCoin

even today, i do not pick up a thrown coin unless it is a #BitCoin

bhai media me aake bayan do .....sale kon hai rumor urane wala.....

brother come before media and give a statement .....who are these to spread rumour.....

VAT zaroor hoga phir :'(

else VAT will be compulsary

Bhai IIT wale hai pehle relationship toh bane laundon ki, break up par nacha rahe ho.https://twitter.com/karanjohar/status/788016043830550529 …

Brother, you are an IITian. First get in to a relation. Then you can worry about break up.

Ye #Airtel aur #Jio ki Kadai kisi communal riot se kuch kam nahi .!! Humey shanti chahiye .!! Kuch kijiye .!!

The war between #Airtel and #Jio is nowhere less than a communal riot. All we need is peace.

@NumbYaar wahi to, jin logo ko mila nahi wo log ke liye kuch chhodne nahi wale ye :(

@NumbYaar That's what, for those who have got nothing, he is not going to leave anything

RT @HyperHegde : Can't comment on degree but it is true that Bachelor hai our master bhi hai #KejriwalSaySorry

Retweet @HyperHegde : Can't comment on degree but it is true he has bachelor and our's master is also there. #KejriwalSaySorry

Uss Shiney ki wajah se meri chamkaan ka huwi hai yahan. @Vjuneesh @Alllahdin @retardedwriter

my shine is being hid due to that Shiney. @Vjuneesh @Alllahdin @retardedwriter

jabtak public nahi sudrega tabtak kuch nahi ho sakta.

nothing will happen until public rectify themselves.

@AyeNuMe @Alllahdin tumhari Aankhein bahot pyaari hai Ayenume

@AyeNuMe @Alllahdin your eyes are so beautiful, Ayenume.

bhai kaun si comics ₹20 me milti hai ab ?

brother, which comics will be available for twenty rupees now?

Bhai @GaurangBhardwa1 galti ki maafi to pehle hi maang chuka hu.. Saza ab kyu de raha hai

brother, @GaurangBhardwa1, i have already asked for forgiveness for my fault earlier..why are you punishing me now

atari 2600 - mere pass yeh system bhi tha jisme ek hi game thi - elevator action . . . . . na jaane kitne joysticks tode thi . . . . . .

atari 2600 - i also had this system which has only one game - elevator action . I do not even know the number of joysticks i have broken.

Salman bhai ki produce ki huvi movie achi na ho ehsa ho hi ni skta....

it is impossible that the movie produced by Salman brother is not good.

Manzil sirf unhai milti hai jo har nahi mante ..

only those people will reach their goal who do not accept failure.

the glass may be rising , but it's not getting any warmer here , lago del desierto , argentina http/URL

the glass may be rising , but it's not getting any warmer here , lake of the desert, argentina http/URL

shaadi kab hai @MeetUunngLee

when is the marriage @MeetUunngLee

Bageera: Mowgli ne Eid manayi aur ab Gudi Padwa bhi mana raha hai Sherkhan: YE HINDU KA KHOON YE MUSALMAAN KA KHOON BATA KYA FARAK HAI ISME.

Bageera: mowgli has celebrated Eid and now he is celebrating Gudi Padwa also Sherkhan:This is the blood of hindu. This is the blood of muslim. now tell me what is the difference between these.

@drpoonam ab iss par rone ka bhi koi matlab nahi, old monk piyo.

@drpoonam There is no meaning in crying on this now, drink old monk.

Bilkul bhi nahi, romantic movie hai woh toh. Nahi pasand tumhe?

Not at all, that is a romantic movie. don't you like it?

@CertifiedKamina bhai hai tu mera

@CertifiedKamina you are my brother

"Saare body parts ek doosre se mile huye hain"pic.twitter.com/4dE5uiJDee

"Every body pahas met one another"pic.twitter.com/4dE5uiJDee

#aaj #sabhi #superhits film.dekhane chale #bbthiseid #superdupar film

#aaj #sabhi #superhits Lets go to watch film #bbthiseid #superdupar film

Sir ghar to pahunch jaate.. Iss baar Airport se hi https://twitter.com/ndtv/status/667760488843898880 …

Sir will definitely reach home.. but this time directly from airpohttps://twitter.com/ndtv/status/667760488843898880 …

Abhi wapas haath use karne hongepic.twitter.com/dNiffrKppK

now there might be a need to use hand again pic.twitter.com/dNiffrKppK

kya hai ye bro?

what is this bro?

Mahashivratri ki hardik shubkamnayein ! Shiva the Adiyogi ' The grace of meditation . #TheBlissfulPeace Om ! Om ! Om Namah Shivaya :)

hearty congratulation for Mahashivratri ! Shiva the first yogi. The grace of meditation . #TheBlissfulPeace salutations to Lord Shiva

Savita Bhabhi, Debonair & Letters to The Penthouse. Aur sun takle, maanavta hi mera dharm hai.

sister-in-law Savita, Debonair & Letters to The Penthouse. and listen bald head, humanity is my only religion.

Galti se TV pe splitsvilla lag gaya.. Ab TV ko Ganga-jal se dhona padega

splitsvilla has been playing on the TV by mistake.. Now there is a need to wash the TV with Ganga water.

@KyaUkhaadLega hahahaha! Nee Year resolution liya hai phone mere siwa kisi ke haath mein mera phone nahi hoga

@KyaUkhaadLega I have taken my new year resolution that my phone will only be in my hands and not in any other hands.

Tujhko mirchi lagi to main kya karun..https://twitter.com/ShekharGupta/status/836255154538074112 …

what should i do if you had chilli..https://twitter.com/ShekharGupta/status/836255154538074112 …

@Bodhisatvaa @bruiselee lekin do dost agar ek pyaale main chai piyenge toh ...

@Bodhisatvaa @bruiselee but if two friends drink tea in the same cup then ...

@toastingtoaster bhai tere liye free @LEDtvn

@toastingtoaster brother this is free for you @LEDtvn

@iamGunjanGrunge ye kaisi hai ?pic.twitter.com/0b645nuTSS

@iamGunjanGrunge how is this ?pic.twitter.com/0b645nuTSS

lolol. Mahine me ekaad bar ho jata hai

laugh out loud, it hapens monthly once

so the penguin/random house merger is to go ahead ? better than it falling into murdoch's clutches . (a mistake for tuc to sell sun 41 yr ago)

so the penguin/random house merger is to go ahead ? better than it falling into murdoch's clutches . (a mistake for tuc to sell sun 41 years ago)

@huh_watnow dekha ek khwaab to ye silsile hue

@huh_watnow I saw a dream and these events occured

lol, yahan mere tweets bhi like nahi karti, main toh phir bhi durr ki baat hu

laugh out loud, she does not even like my tweets here, I am even further away from discussion

@Shahrcasm birthday walo ki profile me aata hai. Market me naya aaya hai forward karo

@Shahrcasm it comes in the profiles of the birthday ones. this is new to market. forward it.

Modi ne free WIFI ka connection band karwa diya ... taake Delhi ke log Ambani Ka free #JIO le le - Arvind kejriwal

Modi has banned the free WIFI connection ... so that the Delhi people uses Ambani's free #JIO4 - Arvind kejriwal

Tan aur Mann desh Kay liye pranam modi ji .

i owe my body and soul fro the country modi sir.

A Raja : Kaash " 2010 me 1.76 lakh crore ke Bitcoins khareed liye hote !

A Raja : It would have been better if i could have bought bitcoins back in 2010 which would value for 1.76lakh crores

*Overheard* "Didi maine suna hai UK alag ho gaya hai EU se.. I hope India ke south me jo jagah hai waha aa jaaye.. Flight sasti hi jaegi.."

*Overheard* "Sister i have heard that united kingdom has been separated from europe.. I hope you would come to the place which is in south india. . cost of filghts is also less.."

Isko bandook de do aur border pe bhej do.. 2 ghante me akal thikaane aa jaegihttps://twitter.com/jimmy9_girl/status/812282726480908288 …

give her a gun and send her to the border.. she will come back to senses in two hours https://twitter.com/jimmy9_girl/status/812282726480908288 …

Ye Sab time nikal ke #Diwali festival ke

all of these have saved some time and celebrated #Diwali festival

@sunnysbluesky lol ashleel hai ye asan

@sunnysbluesky laugh out loud this poster is indecent

Kashmir to hoga.. lekin pakistan nahi hoga.. Awesome poemhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cde32Yo3nzI …

it might be Kashmir.. but it cannot be pakisthan.. awesome poem https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cde32Yo3nzI …

@ROFLaaLa Aaj faisla hoga Laala.

@ROFLaaLa decision will be made today Laala.

Yaar apne ka problem hai na, apneka toh pyatih joke hogayela hai bhai.

dude this is our problem right, who will be on our side brother.

tune samjha kya hai mujhe? Kis ki jurrat jo mujhe ghur kar dekhe bhi?

what have you understood about me. who has that courage to even stare at me.

kis cheez ke baare mein?

about which one?

Pappu left India on 17th Feb for Bang-Kok via #Thai Airways . Uske baad kaha gaye pata nahi . Waah re rangeele Rahul . #RahulOnLeave

Pappu left India on seventeenth February for bangkok via #Thai Airways . we do not know where he has gone after that . great enjoyment Rahul . #RahulOnLeave

haa haaa haaa . . . . hummare class main yeh saubhagy mujhe prapt thaa . . . . ! ! ! kaash office main bhi aise chalk use hoti . . . . lol

i am fortunate to have this facility in class. it would have been good if there is a usage of chalk in the office as well.

Please yaar vapas lele .... aur ek world sirf tu he dilaa sakta hai please request #Dhoni

please dude take it back .... only you can give us another world cup. please request #Dhoni

@Hbddorku bhai kya kar raha hai. Ruk ja

@Hbddorku brother what are you doing. wait

@mahnoor My pleasure,shabaash aisey hi badhiya tweets karrtey raho bahut hansee aatee hai khoon banta hai.Shukriya.

@mahnoor My pleasure, good keep making great tweets like this. they will make me laugh a lot. thank you.

@someUSER cant wait for you to come to dublin on monday so excited to see you:-) &lt

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@Gott_Partikel jor se bolo BHARATMATAKIJAI

@Gott_Partikel say out loudly BHARATMATAKIJAI

RT @HaramiParindey : Pic 1 : Bangladesh fans before the match . Pic 2 : Bangladesh fans after the match . #AsiaCupT20Final #IndvsBan https :/

@HaramiParindey : Picture 1 : Bangladesh fans before the match . Picture 2 : Bangladesh fans after the match . #AsiaCupT20Final #IndvsBan https :/

comments me to recharge sale krne wale bahut h . .

there are lot of people who recharges in comments

the mom's expression in the second last illustration . . . haiiiiiii ! ! ! ! ! super super stuff

the mother's expression in the second last illustration! super stuff

Apne desi "Kanya Waste" ke paas bahot kaala dhan hai aisa lagta hai.https://twitter.com/NewsBytesApp/status/809646569200848896 …

it seems like our authentic "Kanya Waste" has more black money .https://twitter.com/NewsBytesApp/status/809646569200848896 …

inter milan transfer rumours: 5 players linked to the san siro in january: inter milan have started their new . . . http/URL

inter milan transfer rumours that five players linked to the san siro in january. inter milan have started their new . . . http/URL

bhai sahab . . . guddu ne jism movie dekhli lagta hai :)

respected brother . . . it seems that guddu has seen jism movie

Iss root ki sabhi line vyast hai ~ Sehwag

every line in this route is busy ~ Sehwag

Ek #SurgicalStrike un Aunties ki bhi honi chahiye jo mere ghar pe aakar kahti hai Apka chora waha #Cigarette pi raha tha ...

one #SurgicalStrike should also be done by those aunties who come to my home and tell, "your kid was smoking a #Cigarette there

@LaliJogan37 hume aap pasand ho kyuki aap zameen se jude hue hai :)

@LaliJogan37 we are fond of you because you always stay on the ground

@PunsTurnMeOn tere sandaas pun tweets padhke jinko brain cancer hota hai unko rone ko kandha deta hun.

@PunsTurnMeOn i will give my support for those people to cry, who has brain cancer by reading your annoying tweets.

guddu's sir: penalty kick " master " hai ky ? :p

guddu's sir: is he the penalty kick " master " ?

Ye Gutkha Mukesh ki behen lag rahi hai.

she seems like the sister of Gutkha Mukesh

koi na, har ek ka market hota hai.

do not worry, every has their market.

iss baar weekend par bhi kaam hai, isiliye sober.

this time, i am having work even on the weekends. that is why i am sober

guddu is growing up ! bahut kuch dekh aur seekh raha hai ! :p

guddu is growing up ! he is seeing and learning much more.

@Alllahdin waah!! Ab tu phir sojayega, loo se nikal kar.

@Alllahdin waah!! now you will sleep again. come out of the toilet.

faddu trailer bhaijaan. ...

great trailer brother. ...

ha ha ha ! funny ! mujhe to kuchh behtr reply ki ummid thi ! jaisi ki #SurgicalStrike etc

funny ! i hoped for a better reply like #SurgicalStrike etc

ab mujhe yagna karna padega :(

now i have to do a sacrifice

Sir @kamaalrkhan aaj #WorldToiletDay hai, aaj toh kullla kar lo.

Sir @kamaalrkhan today is #WorldToiletDay, atleast gargle today.

.@ArvindKejriwal sir ajay devgn ka role aapse inspired hai. Wo aur uske log innocent hone ka natak karte hain. Uski bhi police se nahi banti

.@ArvindKejriwal sir ajay devgan's role is inspired from you. He and his people act as if they are inncoent. he also has no good relationship with the police.

@MeetUunngLee me too, tu mera Bhai hai. *HIC*

@MeetUunngLee me too, you are my brother.

because y'all have been complaing about him allll the dam time . . not like me since i was in 3rd grade parker has been my main baby &lt

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@Mukeshjio sirji humare chattisgarh Sukma me v ek #jio ka tower lagwa dijiye 0

@Mukeshjio sir please put up one #jio tower in the district of Sukma in chattisgarh