speakers_utterances
sequencelengths 2
24
| emotions
sequencelengths 2
24
| triggers
sequencelengths 2
24
|
---|---|---|
[
"ross: ....right?",
"ross: right?",
"ross: i mean it's pretty unbelievable y'know, i mean they just took off, took off without even looking back.",
"ross: y'know i don't, i don't need them, huh, i've got you guys now as friends, you and susan.",
"carol: ah, susan will be so pleased.",
"ross: 717? where's 717? hey, you've have more of these for susan right?",
"carol: no. but it's okay, i'll just put out pickles or something."
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[
"larry: hey, ready for dinner?",
"phoebe: ooh, absolutely!",
"larry: great! how about you wanted to go the italian place down on bleaker street right?",
"phoebe: ooh, i love that place! so, no.",
"larry: how about mama lisettie's?"
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[
"phoebe: listen, robert's gonna be here any second so, will one of you just tell him?",
"ross: oh.",
"phoebe: please, right now, no, every time i see him it's like is it on the lose?' is it watching me?'"
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[
"rachel: okay, chandler!",
"chandler: okay.",
"rachel: and your horoscope says, \"on the fifth a special someone is going to give you a gift.\"",
"chandler: oh, well thank you in advance."
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[
"joey: you're driving me crazy with that!",
"chandler: okay, i'll stop.",
"joey: don't stop! move the bowl further away! ross could make that shot!",
"joey: well, you suck! but at least you suck at a man's game now.",
"chandler: you wanna play?",
"joey: chandler, i can't be playing games, ross is gonna be home soon."
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[
"ross: what difference does that make?!",
"joey: well, i'm justif the paste matches the pants, you can make yourself a pair of paste pants and she won't know the difference!",
"rachel: joey, do you have a minute?",
"ross: dude, what am i gonna",
"joey: uh, rachel's here, so good luck man, let me know how it works out.",
"rachel: oh, joey, i have such a problem!",
"joey: oh well, you're timing couldn't be better. i am putting out fires all over the place."
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[
"chandler: no-no-no-no. hey!",
"phoebe: anyway, i should go. okay, bye.",
"monica: hey sweetie.",
"chandler: hi sweetie. so, what was with all the whispering?",
"monica: i can't tell you. it's a secret.",
"chandler: secret? married people aren't supposed to have secrets between one another. we have too much love and respect for one another.",
"monica: awww. but still no.",
"chandler: no i'm serious, we should tell each other",
"monica: really? okay, so why don't you tell me what happened to ross junior year at",
"chandler: oh no-no, i can't do that.",
"monica: if you tell me, i'll tell you what phoebe said.",
"chandler: okay.",
"monica: okay.",
"chandler: so, ross and i are going to",
"monica: oh my god. he threw up?",
"chandler: no, he visited a little town south of throw up. so what was phoebe's secret?",
"monica: oh, nancy thompson from phoebe's old massage place is getting fired."
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"ross: well, okay so, i don't have it all worked out quite yet. just don't say anything to rachel, please?",
"phoebe: rachel is one of my closest friends. although, being the only one who knows anything about this does makes me feel special. okay!",
"rachel: okay, stop-stop! phoebe?!",
"phoebe: hey rach!"
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"rachel: i can't believe you don't want to know.",
"rachel: i mean, i couldn't not know, i mean, if, if the doctor knows, and carol knows, and susan knows....",
"monica: and monica knows...",
"ross: wha, heh, how could you know, i don't even know!",
"monica: carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, i asked, she told me.",
"joey: so what's it gonna be?",
"ross: waitohheyhuh, oh great now he knows, and i don't know!",
"monica: i'm sorry, i'm just excited about being an aunt!",
"joey: or an uncle...",
"chandler: hey phoebe!",
"ross: hi pheebs!",
"rachel: pheebs!",
"phoebe: fine!",
"monica: phoebe, what's the matter?",
"phoebe: nothing, i'm sorry, i'm just, i'm out of sorts.",
"rachel: oh, right, that's me!",
"joey: hey, chandler, that table place closes at 7, come on.",
"chandler: fine.",
"monica: phoebe, what is it?",
"phoebe: all right, you know paolo?",
"ross: i'm familiar with his work, yes..."
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[
"joey: hey ross, is uh, is staten island really an island?",
"ross: uh-huh, that's why they call it staten",
"joey: ohhh. i thought it was like long island.",
"ross: also an island.",
"joey: hey, what time is it?"
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"monica: the basket is totally empty! my god, the neighbors ate all the candy!",
"chandler: well, either that or uh",
"monica: joey!!",
"joey: yeah?",
"monica: did you eat all the neighbor candy?!",
"joey: uh well yeah, that was the plan, but by the time i got to it there was only a couple of pieces left!",
"phoebe: yeah, and they've been coming by all day. they love it!",
"monica: they love my candy? oh man!!! i've gotta go make more!!",
"joey: hey mon, you might wanna make some more lasagna too, because something might've happened to a huge chunk of it.",
"monica: ross! the neighbors ate all my candy!!",
"ross: mine stole my newspaper! it's like a",
"phoebe: sure!",
"ross: yeah, ever since you uh, told me that story about that bike i-i couldn't stop thinking about it.",
"ross: i mean, everyone should have a-a",
"phoebe: oh my god ross!!",
"ross: you like it?",
"phoebe: i"
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"chandler: good job joe! well done! top notch!",
"joey: you liked it? you really liked it?",
"chandler: oh-ho-ho, yeah!",
"joey: which part exactly?",
"chandler: the whole thing! can we go?",
"joey: oh no-no-no, give me some specifics.",
"chandler: i love the specifics, the specifics were the best part!",
"joey: hey, what about the scene with the kangaroo? did-did you like that part?",
"chandler: i was surprised to see a kangaroo in a world war i epic.",
"joey: you fell asleep!!",
"joey: there was no kangaroo!",
"joey: they didn't take any of my suggestions!",
"joey: that's for coming buddy.",
"joey: i'll see you later.",
"chandler: don't go!"
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[
"richard: i found the picture!",
"joey: what picture?!",
"richard: the picture of my wife! in your pack!",
"joey: you went through my personal property?"
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[
"joey: hey!",
"monica: hey!",
"joey: you guys got anything to eat? i just went down to johnos for some chicken and it was closed!",
"phoebe: oh, i took larry there to eat but it was all violated. so we shut it down!",
"joey: pheebs, if this guy keeps closing down all of our favorite places, where are we gonna eat?!",
"monica: i don't know, clean places?",
"joey: mm, yum!",
"monica: it's danny.",
"rachel: don't let him in! i'm supposed to be at a regatta gala.",
"monica: we'll be right there! can't you just say it starts later?"
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[
"phoebe: hey!",
"rachel: hi.",
"phoebe: so, did shopping make you feel any better about ross?",
"rachel: manhattan does not have enough stores.",
"phoebe: well,",
"rachel: you can?"
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[
"joey: come on! admit it! that was the best nap you ever had!",
"ross: i've had better.",
"joey: okay! when?!",
"ross: all right! all right! it was the best nap ever!",
"joey: uh-huh!",
"ross: i've said it! okay?! but it's over joey!",
"joey: i want to do it again.",
"ross: we"
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[
"monica: i don't know how any of these got opened?!",
"joey: you opened them all?",
"monica: i know! i know! i am a terrible person! i mean, chandler is never going to trust me with anything ever again!",
"joey: oh hey! you got my parent's gift!",
"monica: yeah. what is that?"
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[
"rachel: you
are
not going to believe it! joshua came into work today, and guess what happened?",
"monica: he asked you out?!",
"rachel: no. but i was showing him some cufflinks and i felt his pulse.",
"monica: saucy!",
"rachel: what are these?"
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[
"rachel: here you go pheebs. who else wants one of my special homemade brownies?",
"chandler: i will have one.",
"chandler: okay, i'm not gonna have one.",
"phoebe: no, no, it's just my tooth.",
"chandler: all right i'll have one.",
"ross: so what's a matter, you need a dentist? i've got a good one.",
"phoebe: no thanks, i have a good one too. i just, i, i can't see him.",
"chandler: see that is the problem with invisible dentists.",
"ross: why? why can't you go to him?",
"phoebe: because, every time i go to the dentist, somebody dies.",
"chandler: that is so weird, because every time i go to the dentist, i look down the hygienist's blouse.",
"rachel: phoebe, what? umm...what?!",
"phoebe: yeah, yeah, first there was my aunt mary, and then there was umm, john, my mailman, and then my, my cowboy friend albino bob'.",
"rachel: and all these people actually died?",
"phoebe: yes, while i was in the chair!",
"phoebe: that's why i take such good care of my teeth now, y'know, it's not about oral hygiene, i floss to save lives!",
"ross: pheebs, come on, you didn't kill anybody, these people just happened to die when you went to the dentist."
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[
"rachel: hi!",
"joey: hey!",
"rachel: joey, i gotta tell ya, i've been thinking",
"joey: oh, you know, the writing was good, and the director is good, and... and my co-star's good",
"rachel: god, you have to tell me what happens tomorrow!",
"joey: ow, i'm just going over the script now! you wanna read lines with me?"
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"rachel: okay, chandler!",
"chandler: okay.",
"rachel: and your horoscope says, \"on the fifth a special someone is going to give you a gift.\""
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[
"carol: looks like it.",
"ross: y'know, if, if this is too weird for you, we can still back out at",
"carol: i got it!"
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[
"monica: oh, god help us.",
"joey: what?",
"monica: ugly naked guy's laying kitchen tile. eww!"
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[
"chandler: hey bob.",
"bob: hey! how's my pal toby doing today?",
"chandler: if i see him, i'll ask.",
"bob: toby!",
"chandler: yeah!",
"mr. franklin: oh then you know each other.",
"chandler: we're on a semi-first name basis.",
"mr. franklin: what do you think of adding him to our team?",
"chandler: bob? ooh, working here with us? everyday? yeah, i don't know if he has what it takes.",
"mr. franklin: really? they love him down on six."
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[
"joshua: all those things i said about not being ready",
"rachel: they're not true?",
"joshua: no, they're-they're all true.",
"rachel: oh."
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[
"singer: cause every time i see your face, i can't help but fall from grace. i know.....",
"joey: wow! this girl is good.",
"phoebe: oh-ho yeah! a song with rhyming words. oo, i never thought of that before.",
"chandler: i like her.",
"phoebe: why? because she can sing and play guitar and do both at the same time?",
"chandler: well, that's pretty much all i'm looking for from these people.",
"monica: look at you. all jealous.",
"ross: yeah pheebs, come on, you two have completely different styles. y'know, she's more.. y'know, and you're more",
"joey: say you'll stay beside me",
"phoebe: okay, see, see, everyone else is happy she's done.",
"singer: okay, my next song's called: phoebe buffay, what can i say.",
"singer: i really loved when we were singing partners, and i shouldn't have left you that way.",
"phoebe: oh no, one of those look for the hidden meaning' songs."
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"phoebe: where's chandler?",
"chandler: here i am.",
"phoebe: wash your hands!!!",
"chandler: how did you
know?",
"ross: hey! what's she doing back here?",
"monica: relax, ross. she's not made of ice cream!",
"ross: hey look, phoebe. i, uh, i laid out the states geographically..."
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[
"chandler: triskaidekaphobia.",
"ross: the fear of",
"joey: no! no, fear of the number 13.",
"ross: it's possible, they have really sharp edges.",
"joey: all right chandler, you're up.",
"ross: wait a minute, i-i believe i'm entitled to use my angel pass for a free turn?",
"chandler: this game makes no sense!",
"ross: y'know what? you're just upset because you're losing.",
"chandler: oh come on ross, i think we're all losers here.",
"joey: all right. chandler, you can either spin the wheel or pick a google card.",
"chandler: let me think. let me thinkoh! i don't care.",
"joey: you-you must choose mr. bing.",
"chandler: either, it makes no difference.",
"joey: choose, you jackass!",
"chandler: i'll take a card.",
"joey: okay, you picked the gimmie card! you get all of ross's points!",
"ross: what?!",
"chandler: this game is kinda fun.",
"ross: you don't think it's a little crazy that you get all my points just cause you"
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"ross: okay, look, i-i know what you guys are going to say",
"phoebe: you two will have very hairy children.",
"ross: okay, i didn't know you would say that."
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[
"dr. wesley: good-bye and god speed, hope brady.",
"dr. drake remoray: not so fast wesley!",
"dr. wesley: ramoray!"
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[
"monica: hey, what's up?",
"rachel: i just saw danny getting on the subway with a girl and he had his arm around her.",
"monica: oh, honey, i'm sorry.",
"rachel: well, you should be, this is all your fault! you meddled in our relationship!!",
"monica: you had no relationship!!",
"rachel: no, but i was doing my thing and everything was going according to the plan!",
"monica: oh god, stop with the plan!",
"monica: so what, so what you saw him with a girl?"
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"gerston: uh, like, could these margaritas",
"santos: hello, mr. bing.",
"petrie: loved your stevie wonder last night.",
"chandler: thanks. listen, about the weekly numbers, i'm gonna need them on my desk",
"santos: sure.",
"gerston: no problem.",
"chandler: you have to give 'em something, you know."
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[
"ross: oh, hey, gunther, check this out.",
"gunther: yeah, that-that chandler cracks me up.",
"joey: hey ross, listen, you want anything to drink, cause i'm heading up there.",
"ross: uh, yeah, i'll take a coffee. thanks, man.",
"joey: sure. coffee? cause i'm going up there.",
"rachel: no.",
"monica: no, thank you.",
"joey: you guys need anything, cause i'm heading up there.",
"woman: i'd love an ice water.",
"joey: you got it.",
"monica: joey, what are you doing?",
"joey: just being friendly.",
"rachel: joey, honey, i don't think you're supposed to go back there.",
"joey: nah, it's okay. right, gunther?"
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[
"older scientist: dr. geller, there's a seat over here.",
"ross: thank you, dr. phillips, but i'm having my lunch at this table, here in the middle.",
"ross: i'm having lunch right here, with my good friend joey, if he'll sit with me.",
"joey: i will sit with you dr. geller.",
"ross: y'know, we work in a museum of natural history, and yet there is something unnatural about the way we eat lunch.",
"ross: now, i look around this cafeteria, and y'know what i see, i see-i see division.",
"ross: division, between people in white coats and people in blue blazers, and i ask myself, \"my god why?!\"",
"ross: now, i say we shed these-these coats that separate us, and we get to know the people underneath.",
"ross: i'm ross!",
"ross: i'm divorced, and i have a kid!",
"joey: i'm joey! i'm an actor! i don't know squat about dinosaurs!",
"another tour guide: i'm ted, and i just moved here a month ago, and new york really scares me.",
"ross: all right, there you go!",
"joey: yeah, you hang in there teddy!"
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[
"carl: i'm just sayin', if i see one more picture of ed begley, jr. in that",
"ross: i can't believe you'd rather go out with him than me.",
"rachel: would you excuse me, please? i'm trying to have a date here.",
"ross: fine, just stop thinking about me.",
"ross: can't do it, can you?",
"rachel: so i'm thinking about you. so what?",
"ross: i don't get it. what do you see in this guy, anyway?",
"rachel: well... he happens to be a very nice... guy....",
"carl: i mean, come on, buddy, get a",
"ross: rachel, come on. give us a chance."
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[
"chandler: yeah.",
"monica: look, these clowns are trying to take us for a ride and i'm not gonna let 'em!",
"monica: and we're not a couple of suckers!",
"chandler: i hear ya, mugsy!",
"chandler: but look, all these rooms are fine okay?",
"chandler: can you just pick one so i can watch--have a perfect, magical weekend together with you.",
"monica: okay,"
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"ross: ....and 12, 22, 18, four... what?",
"chandler: i spelled out boobies.",
"monica: ross, but me down for another box of the mint treasures, okay. where, where are the mint treasures?",
"ross: ah, we're out. i sold them all.",
"monica: what?",
"monica: no.",
"monica: no, just, just, just a couple more boxes.",
"monica: it-it-it's no big deal, all right, i'm-i'm cool.",
"monica: you gotta help me out with a couple more boxes!",
"ross: mon, look at yourself. you have cookie on your neck.",
"monica: oh god!",
"chandler: so, how many have you sold so far?"
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"monica: we heard about your pants, i'm so sorry.",
"ross: this year was supposed to be great!",
"ross: but, it's only the second day and i'm a loser with stupid leather pants that don't even fit!",
"all: no. no, you're not a loser.",
"ross: look at me!",
"monica: hey, hey, look. look ross, ben drew a picture of you! huh? you're-you're a cowboy!"
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"rachel: okay. just give us a second. ross!",
"ross: yeah?",
"rachel: give her some money.",
"ross: i really think they're out of rooms.",
"rachel: they're not!! ross, they're just saving them for the important people!! okay?! what-what if i was the president?!",
"ross: well then we'd be in a lot of trouble, you don't know where any countries are.",
"ross: okay.",
"ross: uh, say would you umm
would you mind checking again to see if any umm, private rooms may have opened up?",
"nurse: this is a hospital.",
"rachel: y'know what?"
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"joey: it can’t be me, i’m standing right here.",
"mr. geller: wanna peek?",
"ross: no!",
"mr. geller: come on!",
"joey: we’re not peeking?"
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"monica: dad, please don't pick your teeth out here!",
"monica: alright, and if you're gonna put your feet up, why don't you sit on the-",
"phoebe: monica, leave him alone",
"joey: will you hurry up?",
"joey: did you not hear me before when i told you that all of janine's friends are dancers?!",
"joey: and that they're going to be drinking alot!",
"rachel: no, i did, but tell me again, because it's so romantic.",
"joey: well you're whippin' so slow! can't you do it any faster?",
"rachel: joey!",
"rachel: come on!",
"rachel: i don't wanna make any mistakes, alright?",
"rachel: this is the only dessert and if i screw it up everybody's gonna be like oh, remember that thanksgiving when rachel screwed up the trifle?",
"rachel: so why don't you just let me worry about making the trifle and you just worry about eating it, alright?"
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"joey: i know it doesn't make much sense",
"chandler: much",
"joey: look chandler, it was instinct! okay? i just went for it!",
"chandler: so you risked your life, for a sandwich!",
"joey: i know it sounds crazy, but chandler this is the greatest sandwich in the world!",
"chandler: so you didn't uh, choose ross before me.",
"joey: no! i would never do that! you-you're like my brother!",
"chandler: really?!",
"joey: yeah! in fact, to prove how much you mean to me, here.",
"chandler: thanks.",
"joey: no, eh, oh-oi, easy, it's not a hot dog!",
"joey: how good is that?",
"chandler: oh-oi-ho, yeah!",
"joey: see?",
"joey: oh-whoa-hey, dude, what are you doing?!",
"chandler: i thought you were showing me how much you mean to me."
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"monica: i don't know how any of these got opened?!",
"joey: you opened them all?",
"monica: i know! i know! i am a terrible person! i mean, chandler is never going to trust me with anything ever again!",
"joey: oh hey! you got my parent's gift!",
"monica: yeah. what is that?",
"joey: well, i don't know. i think it does something to salami.",
"monica: hey! how'd it go?"
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"joey: morning! hey, how's my favorite genius and my little robot buddy?!",
"wayne: don't touch him!",
"joey: okay!"
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"phoebe: oh my god! how did you get back here?!",
"phoebe: fire alarm? oh! hi, officerfireman, can-can i help you?",
"the fireman: we found your fire alarm in the trash chute.",
"phoebe: that's not mine.",
"the fireman: yes it is.",
"phoebe: how do you know?",
"the fireman: the next time you want to dump a fire alarm in a trash chute, don't wrap it in a blanket that says, \"property of phoebe buffay not monica.\"",
"phoebe: okay do youokay, do you have a search warrant? because the last time i checked this was still america!",
"the fireman: please reattach this, it's against the law to disconnect them.",
"phoebe: fine! but please god.. tell me how to stop them from going off!",
"the fireman: there's a reset button under the plastic cover.",
"phoebe: there's a reset button?!",
"phoebe: my god!",
"phoebe: why didn't i see that!",
"phoebe: reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button?",
"phoebe: oh here it is!",
"phoebe: oh!"
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"phoebe: good for you! and hey, i thought your paper on punctuated equilibrium in the devonian era was top notch!",
"ross: stop going through my stuff !",
"rachel: hey!",
"monica: hey!",
"rachel: i just wanted to let you know i've changed my mind: i'm gonna do it, i'm gonna kiss joey.",
"monica: no, you can't! friends hooking up is a bad idea.",
"rachel: please, what about you and chandler?",
"monica: that's different! i was drunk and stupid!",
"rachel: well hello !",
"monica: what about all the guys that you've got the phone numbers from? why don't you just kiss one of them?",
"rachel: i could, i could but i don't want to! i want to kiss joey!",
"monica: alright . i think it's a big mistake but it's your decision.",
"rachel: i'm gonna do it."
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"ross: so honey, this morning was fun, huh? me hopping in on you in the shower there.",
"carol: yeah! and maybe someday we could get a place with two bathrooms.",
"ross: look carol umm, i was, i was thinking maybe uh, maybe we can spice things up a little.",
"carol: what do you mean?",
"ross: carol our sex life isit's just not working",
"ross: hey there little fella!"
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"ross: ahh, no.",
"rachel: oh.",
"ross: are you jealous?",
"rachel: noo, i y'know i don't see why she has to play with you, that's all.",
"rachel: i mean doesn't she have any y'know other stripper moms friends of her own?",
"ross: you are totally jealous.",
"rachel: i'm not jealous.",
"rachel: all right this is about, umm, people feeling certain things y'know about strippers.",
"rachel: and y'know, and um, i...",
"ross: honey, i love you too.",
"rachel: ugh. wait, wait, wait.",
"ross: what?"
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"joey: hey!",
"monica: hey!",
"joey: you guys got anything to eat? i just went down to johnos for some chicken and it was closed!",
"phoebe: oh, i took larry there to eat but it was all violated. so we shut it down!",
"joey: pheebs, if this guy keeps closing down all of our favorite places, where are we gonna eat?!",
"monica: i don't know, clean places?",
"joey: mm, yum!",
"monica: it's danny.",
"rachel: don't let him in! i'm supposed to be at a regatta gala.",
"monica: we'll be right there! can't you just say it starts later?",
"rachel: what? what kind of a regatta gala starts at night?!",
"monica: the fake kind!",
"danny: hey, hi, i need a ladle. you got a ladle?",
"monica: we have a ladle."
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"joey: apparently, there's like a million guys out there that can play mac, and there's only this one robot and this one guy who controls it!",
"joey: i didn't know he could get me fired!",
"joey: what am i going to do?"
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"joey: i'm so bored! stupid rain, we... we can't do anything.",
"rachel: well, i've brought some books. we could read.",
"joey: hey, it hasn't come to that yet.",
"joey: hey hey hey! don't mind if i do!",
"waiter: i'm sorry sir, these are for the pharmaceutical convention",
"joey: hey rach, do you feel like going to a convention?",
"rachel: we can't. we're not pharmacists!"
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"rachel: well there's yore. and uh, y'know, yesteryear.",
"phoebe: yeah no, i'm telling you rachel has such a great eye for this stuff.",
"phoebe: ross, y'know if you ever decide you need to redecorateand i think that you should.",
"phoebe: you should, you should ask rachel to help.",
"rachel: oh honey he doesn't need my help.",
"phoebe: oh, come on! i think he's ready to get rid of, what did you call it? the cheap knock-offs and dinosaur junk.",
"ross: really?!",
"ross: hey, y'know what?",
"ross: since you have such a great sense of what i need, uh ooh, here's-here's 60 bucks, why don't you take phoebe down to that colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.",
"rachel: y'know what? i don't, i don't think phoebe really wants to come.",
"phoebe: no! i do want to!",
"rachel: oh, she does want to."
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"fireman no. 3: we get off around midnight, why don't we pick you up then?",
"rachel: so, um, will you bring the truck?",
"fireman no. 3: i'll even let you ring the bell.",
"rachel: oh, my god.",
"phoebe: see, there you go, the cleansing works!",
"monica: they're nice guys.",
"rachel: oh, they're firemen guys."
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"joey: hey!",
"chandler: please tell me you got the message!",
"joey: what message?"
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"rachel: hey!",
"ross: hi!",
"rachel: what are you doing here?",
"ross: ah y'know, this building is on my paper route so i...",
"rachel: oh.",
"ross: hi.",
"rachel: hi.",
"ross: how'd did it go?",
"rachel: oh well, the woman i interviewed with was pretty tough, but y'know thank god mark coached me, because once i started talking about the fall line, she got all happy and wouldn't shut up."
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"joey: so, did you uh, find anyone to marry you guys yet?",
"chandler: no, but horny for monica minister called, wanting to know if we were still together.",
"monica: we're never gonna find anybody.",
"joey: well then let me do it!",
"chandler: joe",
"joey: no-no-no!",
"joey: look, i've been thinking about it.",
"joey: i'm an actor right?",
"joey: so i won't get nervous talking in front of people.",
"joey: i won't spit, and i won't stare at monica's breasts!"
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"kate: become a drama critic!",
"the director: i am hurt! a plague on both your houses!",
"kate: by the way, he dumped me tonight after he read my review.",
"joey: oh, classy.",
"kate: yep! i sure know how to pick em, huh? y'know i gave up a part on a soap for this!",
"joey: wow! yeah i ah, i gave up a job too.",
"kate: really. what?",
"joey: uh, de-clawing cats.",
"joey: hey, tell ya what.",
"joey: let me walk you home.",
"joey: we'll stop by every news stand and burn every copy of their times and the post.",
"kate: why the post?",
"joey: oh, you didn't see the post?",
"kate: no. you?"
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"rachel: isn't it incredible?! monica and chandler, gettin' married.",
"phoebe: i know, they're gonna be",
"rachel: ohh
i mean two best friends falling in love, how often does that happen?",
"phoebe: not",
"rachel: no! i'm so happy for them!",
"phoebe: me too! so happy for them!",
"phoebe: oh no! no god, definitely not jealous!"
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"rachel: that's right, still no baby! come on people! please make some room!",
"ross: uh sweetie, maybe you'd be more comfortable here?",
"rachel: you. like you haven't done enough.",
"ross: look, i-i know how miserable you are, i wish there was something i can do.",
"ross: i mean i wish i were a seahorse.",
"ross: because with seahorses it's the male, they carry the babies.",
"ross: and then also umm, i'd be far away in the sea.",
"rachel: god. i have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life!",
"phoebe: oh i know, i've been there. i remember toward the end",
"rachel: oh phoebe, that's a great story.",
"rachel: can you tell it to me when you're getting me some iced tea?",
"rachel: oh god, get out!"
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"pete: lights. uh, romantic lights.",
"monica: ooh, nice.",
"pete: so ah, there was this thing i wanted to talk to you about.",
"monica: oh, right! i completely forgot about that.",
"pete: well ah, i've been doing a lot of thinking, and i look at my life",
"monica: yeah?",
"pete: and i feel like i've conquered the business world, and i feel like i've conquered the intellectual world, and now i-i have the most beautiful woman in the world.",
"monica: wow.",
"pete: there's one thing missing.",
"monica: what's that?",
"pete: it's time for me to conquer the physical world.",
"monica: okay.",
"pete: monica, i want to become the ultimate fighting champion.",
"monica: you wanna what?!",
"pete: i want to become the ultimate fighting champion! it's the most intense physical competition in the world, it's banned in 49 states!",
"monica: what are you talking about?",
"pete: okay, my trainer, ho chi, is teaching me a combination of gee koon doe and brazilian street fighting, i've even had my own octagon training ring designed.",
"monica: and i suppose you used a ring designer for that.",
"pete: yeah.",
"pete: monica, i want you there in the front row when i win.",
"pete: i want you close enough to smell the blood.",
"pete: what do you think?",
"monica: my parents will be so happy."
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"phoebe: wash your hands!!!"
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"monica: did you just flick me?",
"rachel: ok, well, you wouldn't let me finish and i was jus- [monica flicks her back] ow. that hurt [flicks monica]",
"phoebe: oh! all right. now, let's not do this!",
"phoebe: happy thoughts! happy thoughts!",
"phoebe: ok, now i'm gonna kick some ass.",
"rachel: ow! ow! ow!"
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"phoebe: drum roll.",
"chandler: okay. okay. all right. help! am i a mark, or a john?",
"joey: nah, you're not tall enough to be a mark, but you might make a good barney.",
"chandler: all right look, am i serious, okay? tomorrow at 3:30 i am going down to the courthouse.",
"phoebe: you're actually going through with this?",
"chandler: hey, look, this name has been holding me back my entire life.",
"chandler: okay, it's probably why kids picked on me in school, and why i never do well with women
so, as of 4 o'clock tomorrow, i'm either gonna be mark johnson or john markson.",
"phoebe: you got problems because of you!"
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"chandler: oh good, okay, i can't take it anymore.",
"chandler: i can't take it anymore.",
"chandler: so you win, okay?",
"chandler: here!",
"chandler: pheebs?",
"chandler: flying a jet?"
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"monica: is he crazy?! you just had ross’s baby!",
"rachel: well, i-i said yes.",
"monica: what?!",
"monica: are you crazy?",
"monica: you just had ross’s baby!",
"monica: it’s-it’s so inappropriate.",
"monica: no, it’s worse than that.",
"monica: it’s wrong.",
"monica: it’s… it is bigger than mine!",
"rachel: i know.",
"monica: you can’t marry him!"
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"danny: so we finally get to the top of the mountain and airhead here forgets the camera!",
"joey: oh, y'know the same thing happened to me one time.",
"chandler: when did that happen to you?!",
"joey: don't you remember when we were jogging in the park and we saw that really pretty bird and wanted to take a picturei didn't have my camera!",
"chandler: oh yeah. first off all, chasing the churo guy isn't jogging.",
"krista: oh, this is so good you have got to try it.",
"danny: oh, damn! i got it on my pants.",
"krista: here, i'll get it."
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"joey: sure, i can hang out til i have to meet ya. what uhhow come you're not going?",
"chandler: i have a job interview i have to get ready for.",
"joey: i thought you already have a job.",
"chandler: and people say you don't pay attention.",
"chandler: no, this is a much better job.",
"chandler: it's vice-president of a company that does data reconfiguration and statistical factoring for other companies.",
"joey: wow! how do you know how to do that?!",
"chandler: that's what i do now.",
"monica: hey joey, come taste this.",
"joey: what is it?",
"monica: remember that guy that gave me a bad review? well
i'm getting my revenge!",
"joey: you cooked him?",
"monica: no.",
"monica: he teaches a course on food criticism at the new school, so before we go to the movies i wanna go by there and make him try my bouillabaisse again.",
"monica: oh, i cannot wait to read the front page of the post tomorrow!"
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"phoebe: chandler, i found the perfect ring.",
"chandler: oh, that's uh, that's pretty nice but i'm gonna go with the one i picked first.",
"phoebe: oh my god chandler, the one you picked is gone. it's over!",
"chandler: what?",
"phoebe: some guy bought it. i'm sorry. i tired to stop it but they put me in jail!",
"chandler: they put you in jail?",
"phoebe: the little jail between the doors!",
"chandler: phoebe, i asked you to guard the ring!",
"phoebe: i know, i'm sorry! but y'know, this ring is better! monica never even saw the other ring.",
"chandler: yeah but when he proposed to me with the ring i got goose bumps."
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"chandler: will you marry me?",
"joey: it's the big night! we wanted to wish you good luck!",
"ross: yeah, yeah you have the ring?",
"chandler: yeah, right here in my pocket. pheebs?",
"phoebe: oh! oop!",
"chandler: okay, now will you guys get out of here? i want this is to be a surprise and she's gonna know.",
"ross: yeah-yeah you guys. get out of here!",
"monica: hi guys.",
"chandler: you are beautiful.",
"monica: oh, thank you! what's going on?"
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[
"phoebe: relax every muscle in your body.",
"phoebe: listen to the plinky-plunky music.",
"phoebe: okay, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place.",
"phoebe: okay, tell me your happy place.",
"monica: richard's living room, drinking wine.",
"phoebe: all right. no, no, no, not a richard thing, just put down the glass. and get out!",
"monica: i'm sorry, but that's my happy place.",
"phoebe: well, okay, fine, use my happy place.",
"phoebe: okay, i'm just gonna, i have to ask that you don't move anything.",
"monica: all right, i'll try not to.",
"phoebe: okay, all right, so, your in a meadow, millions of stars in the sky....",
"monica: do you think breaking up with him was a huge mistake?",
"phoebe: all right, there are no questions in the happy place. okay, just, the warm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the trees...."
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"phoebe: hey!",
"rachel: hi pheebs!",
"phoebe: are you moving out?",
"rachel: no, these aren't all my suitcases. this one's paolo's.",
"phoebe: um, um, rachel can we talk for a sec?",
"rachel: well, sure...just a sec, though, 'cause paolo's on his way over.",
"phoebe: oh! ok, um, ok, um,",
"rachel: oh, pheebs, pheebs...",
"phoebe: ok, um, we haven't known each other for that long a time, and, um, there are three things that you should know about me.",
"phoebe: one, my friends are the most important thing in my life, two, i never lie, and three, i make the best oatmeal raisin cookies in the world.",
"rachel: ok, thanks pheebs oh my god, why have i never tasted these before?!"
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"phoebe: shh! get me out of here.",
"rachel: oh.",
"joey: ross!",
"ross: what?",
"joey: come here, check this out!",
"ross: what? is it the comet?",
"joey: no! no-no. look, there's a bug stuck in tar right here.",
"ross: joey comei can't believei bring you here to see the bapstein-king comet, one of nature's most spectacular phenomenon, and all you care about are bugs stuck in tar and-and some woman!",
"joey: y'know, there's",
"ross: show me where?"
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"monica: would you ever be a surrogate for anyone?",
"rachel: it depends on who asked.",
"monica: what if i asked?",
"rachel: oh, mon, sure.",
"monica: really?",
"rachel: yes. you're not asking are you?"
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"phoebe: are you okay?",
"rachel: i need some milk.",
"phoebe: ok, i've got milk here you go... oh! better?",
"rachel: no..."
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"phoebe: this sucks!",
"phoebe: all right, what's my next present?"
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"phoebe: you said i was boring--ohh!",
"ross: when did i say you were boring?!",
"phoebe: oh my god, i remember now! we were playing chess!",
"ross: phoebe! you and i have",
"phoebe: oh, come on!",
"phoebe: yes, remember that time on the frozen lake?"
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[
"rachel: hi joey! what are you doing here?",
"joey: uhh, well i've got an audition down the street and i spilled sauce all over the front of my shirt. you got an extra one?",
"rachel: yeah, sure. umm
here.",
"joey: great. you got anything that's not",
"rachel: yeah, i don't think so joe.",
"joey: all right, i guess this will be fine.",
"rachel: hey, listen umm, what-what are you doing tonight?",
"joey: nothing, why?",
"rachel: how would you feel about taking out my assistant tag? i'll pay.",
"joey: huh, rach i got to say it's gonna take a lot of money for me to go out on a date with a dude.",
"rachel: i'm not asking you to go on a",
"joey: really? cause i could kinda use the money.",
"rachel: joey, just-just he-he's new in town and i know he doesn't have any guy friends.",
"rachel: just take him to like a ball game or something.",
"rachel: i'll really appreciate it.",
"joey: yeah, okay."
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"monica: hey, rach, can i borrow your eyelash curler, i think i lost mine.",
"rachel: yeah, it's in there.",
"joey: oh! ohh! oh!!",
"chandler: joey, can i talk to you for a second?",
"joey: oohh!! ohh! oh-oh-oh! oh-oh!!",
"joey: oooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh",
"chandler: yes. yes.",
"joey: you?! and-and you?!",
"monica: yes, but you cannot tell anyone! no one knows!",
"joey: how?! when?!",
"chandler: it happened in london.",
"joey: in london!!!",
"chandler: the reason we didn't tell anyone was because we didn't want to make a big deal out of it.",
"joey: but it is a big deal!! i have to tell someone!",
"chandler: no-no-no-no-no! you can't!",
"monica: please? please?! we just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay? just promise you won't tell.",
"joey: all right! man, this is unbelievable! i mean, it's",
"monica: i know, it's great!"
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"phoebe: i'm sorry i won't be able to make it to your imaginary wedding, but i'm",
"rachel: i know. i know. i panicked, i panicked. i didn't want him to start yelling at me like i was some '74 latour.",
"phoebe: it's lafite. the '74 latour is actually drinking quite nicely.",
"rachel: all right here he comes. i'm gonna do this, i'm gonna tell him, i'm gonna be strong.",
"dr. green: i just called a friend of mine.",
"rachel: yeah?",
"dr. green: i think i may be able to book",
"rachel: really?!",
"dr. green: what is it sweetie?",
"rachel: there's not gonna be a wedding. ross and i are not getting married.",
"rachel: i'm sorry daddy.",
"dr. green: i don't believe this!!",
"rachel: oh now daddy, stay calm. please."
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[
"elizabeth: oh please! it was such a big class! you never even noticed me!",
"ross: what? of course i did! you uh, you sat next to sleepy sleeperson.",
"elizabeth: who?",
"ross: oh uh, i had trouble remembering everyone's name, so i-i kinda came up with nicknames.",
"ross: like the guy on the other side of you was smelly von brownshirt.",
"elizabeth: oh yeah. so umm, did you have a nickname for me?",
"ross: umm, no. no.",
"elizabeth: yes you did! what was it?",
"ross: umm, it's cutie mcpretty.",
"elizabeth: ohh that's so sweet!"
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"rachel: what? why? where are you?",
"joey: i'm still on the set!",
"rachel: joey! the wedding is in less than an hour!"
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[
"ross: sorry i'm late, i was stuck at work. there was this big dinosaur.. thing.. anyway.",
"susan: hi.",
"carol: ross, you remember susan.",
"ross: how could i forget?",
"susan: ross.",
"ross: hello, susan. good shake. good shake. so, uh, we're just waiting for...?",
"carol: dr. oberman.",
"ross: ..dr. oberman. okay. and is he-"
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[
"phoebe: listen, robert's gonna be here any second so, will one of you just tell him?",
"ross: oh.",
"phoebe: please, right now, no, every time i see him it's like is it on the lose?' is it watching me?'",
"chandler: we can't tell him, you can't go up to a guy you barely know and talk about his.... stuff.",
"ross: he's right, even if it's to say something complementary."
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[
"chandler: triskaidekaphobia.",
"ross: the fear of",
"joey: no! no, fear of the number 13.",
"ross: it's possible, they have really sharp edges.",
"joey: all right chandler, you're up.",
"ross: wait a minute, i-i believe i'm entitled to use my angel pass for a free turn?",
"chandler: this game makes no sense!",
"ross: y'know what? you're just upset because you're losing.",
"chandler: oh come on ross, i think we're all losers here.",
"joey: all right. chandler, you can either spin the wheel or pick a google card.",
"chandler: let me think. let me thinkoh! i don't care.",
"joey: you-you must choose mr. bing.",
"chandler: either, it makes no difference.",
"joey: choose, you jackass!",
"chandler: i'll take a card.",
"joey: okay, you picked the gimmie card! you get all of ross's points!"
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"the woman: yes! yes! please, just give it to me!",
"chandler: yeah, that's her.",
"the woman: thank you."
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[
"rachel: okay.",
"chandler: okay, we have to talk. i'm just getting out of a very serious relationship",
"janice: i know! and i'm just getting out of a marriage, i mean talk about meant to be!",
"chandler: right! i just think that this is happening too soon.",
"janice: oh, too soon, too schmoon. face it honey, i am not letting you get away this time.",
"chandler: i hear ya. but! unfortunately, my company is transferring me overseas!",
"janice: oh no! where to? too paris?",
"chandler: no! no! not, paris.",
"janice: too london? no-no, rome? vienna? ooh-ooh, barcelona?",
"chandler: okay, could you just stop talking for a second? yemen. that's right, yes, i'm being transferred to yemen!"
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