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when i was 16-18 i was involved with countless older guys (20-30) on platforms like discord, instagram, snapchat etc. i've been smaller my entire life, and some of them loved that i looked younger than i actually was.
something i've never been able to forget being told is "i like you because you're 17, but could easily pass for 14".
these people were obviously sick and twisted, i know that, but i just turned 20, and seeing my body develop more and my face become narrower has devastated me. i have this voice in the back of my head saying "you could never pass for 14 now" and it makes me feel hideous.
i lose more and more weight but it only makes my face look more narrow and i feel fatigued all the time. i feel i don't look pretty, that i'll never be pretty again. i just want to be young again
the most terrifying part is that i've become just like these men, i'm only loveable as a little girl. i feel disgusting
| You probably need a therapist. That kind of shit at such a young age can fuck up your self image and worldview. It's genuinely traumatizing even if you don't think it is right now. |
If you try to shovel your "dont be fat phobic" bullshit to me I'll kindly tell you to fuck yourself. I can't look at reflection without getting depressed, people shouldn't have anymore than 1 chin and here I am with 2 and a half. My thighs are bigger around than most tree trunks, and my tits are bigger than most women's. I fucking hate it. I don't ever fuckin eat so where the fuck does it fuckin come from? | Biomedical issues aside like thyroid issues or diabetes, it sounds like you’re still not burning more calories than you’re taking in. How active are you? And I gotta tell you, walking helps a lot, especially if you’re not the gym type which is totally fine.
I know you said you’re not eating a lot but it does help to eat. I would personally seek help from a nutritionist or dietician. It’s not a long term services that they provide; they simply teach you how to manage your food intake. As far as your energy OUTput, it definitely helps to stay active. Go on more walks, take the stairs instead of an elevator, choose to walk instead of driving if that’s an option to wherever you’re going. And as a gym goer myself, lifting weights can help. Putting on muscle burns calories and simply maintaining that muscle burns calories. So not only are you getting stronger, you’re toning down. It’s a win-win. You’ll feel better emotionally too. I really hope you start to make changes so that you’re more happy with your self-image.
Also, on a very important note, please be active and eat more wholesome foods for YOUR sake. You’re clearly not happy with your body, so I hope you make changes so that you can be. Best of luck. |
They're so fucking annoying yes I know the watermelon exploded so your hungry ass wants to fly and buzz around like a bitch to find the fruit but it's GONE keyword GONE so fly away or just go in water or just let me kill you. Tired of y'all always flying in my face when I'm trying to sleep I feel attacked
This isn't a troll post I'm being serious they are irritating me so much
Edit: why is this getting upvoted
those who downvoted this are fruit flies🙄🙄🙄🙄 | I hate flies because they infested my dog's wound and rot him inside, they killed him. I just can hope there's a fly hell and that they all go to it, or at least that 99% of them have horrible, long, and painful deaths. |
I really love helping people, yes. I want everyone to be well but it gets to a point where it's just tiring.
I've been a therapist friend for so many people but get nothing or almost nothing in return... I'm just so done and tired with always feeling the need to help because I'm destroying myself in the process.
But when I have a problem? No one's there for me. I'm just so angry and tired and I swear I can't do this anymore. Anyone got any advice? | I feel you. It’s a one sided relationship and no one is refilling your emotional charge. I was that friend. I work in human services. I stopped everything when I learned enough was enough. |
I'm almost 100% sure that most people don't have severe anxiety that changes their life, actual suicidal thoughts, feelings of sadness for no reason, and chronic fatigue even without doing anything.
I'm also pretty sure most people don't self harm (I actually relapsed today, hoo-fucking-ray), cry for no reason, have panic attacks that make you wanna vommit, and family issues.
So no, stop trying to invalidate my mental health just because "everyone has that". | lmao my dad told me he would believe I (25f) have ADHD if I showed him a formal diagnosis.
So I did.
His response?
“Well everyone has a little bit of that.”
It’s not a little bit. It disrupts my life and presents challenges in areas that neurotypical people don’t have to deal with. Don’t shut me down because of YOUR preconceived notions on what ADHD means.
My dad and I are extremely close but this just irks me to no end. |
Yesterday evening I was on my way home, and I get a chat from some dude. He had no bitmoji, and asked me how I’m doing and if I was into older men. I said “no not rlly” and he said “awww that’s a shame.” Even tho he doesn’t ever know wtf I look like, cuz all he saw was my bitmoji.
Few hours later, I was just chilling up in my room and I got an Instagram dm from a random guy asking how old I was and if I was a virgin. I told him to fuck off and he did. And I blocked him lol.
20 mins later, same thing from another guy. He asked how old I was, and what my virginity status was, and he kept saying how he’s gonna fuck me and stick his dick in my ass. I trolled him for a while, and I just gave him a fake phone number that girls can give to creeps. That entertained me for a good 1.5 hours. I liked when he sent me the dick pic so I sent him one back.
Then 30 mins later I got ANOTHER dm from a guy asking to see my ass and panties. So I blocked him because I was too lazy to even respond.
I decided to shut down Instagram and check my Snapchat before going to bed, and there was a chat from a guy once again asking, “how old are you, are you a virgin” so I just asked why he needed to know, and he’s said “nothing, no reason.” And then he sent another chat a couple mins later and said “good luck” so I blocked his ass.
And in case anything ever happens, this is why I always keep a scissor blade with me when I’m out, and a switchblade and baseball bat when I sleep.
Srry motherfuckers but girls don’t exist just for u to fuck us. Suck ur own dick. | I'm having a hard time putting myself in their shoes. Why would that be your first question??? Why would you just send a dick pick for no reason?? As a guy, i just dont get it. Are they all mentally handicapped or am i just an outlier? |
So here’s some explanation. I’m 16. I live with my parents and my 2 younger siblings. There’s a young lady who lives here with us. She is 20.
She has lived with us since she was 18. She went to the same high school as me, she was a senior when I was a freshman.
She would date freshmen, mind you, 14 year olds.
When she was 19 she tried hitting on my sister. My, at the time, 11 year old sister. She even would grope my sister, even after my sister told her to stop. she did it a few times until I told her that was disgusting and called her a pedo.
Now this young lady is 20. She talks to young high schoolers, people younger than I am, and gets into relationships with them.
Am I the only one finding this wrong?
I find her absolutely disgusting. I hate living with her and I hate that she practically sexually assaulted my little sister. | Call the police then |
Merry Christmas my friend. I will leave a plate out for you, and a drink for when you are ready. You are loved and wanted. I’m so glad you’re here. | Merry Christmas to you, I would love to knit you a crochet of hello kitty |
It KINDA depends on how they say it I hate stubborn people, but gosh that quote kinda pisses me off imo
update/edit: I didn’t expect this to blow up so decently I was just speaking my mind for silent strangers but yea I could see suicide could snowball and fuck with other peoples lives and how yea it could be kinda selfish, but the quote still just pisses me off lol especially if there going through it and theres alot of times where I think people off themselves for dumb reasons where they could of so easily fixed it and moved on but I have brain damage, PTSD, and loneliness from the damage | Yeah, from firsthand experience being told this when you’re suicidal doesn’t help at all. It just feels like guilt tripping when you’re already going through one of the worst things you can go through. |
being scared of crossing paths with men, the fucking periods every fucking months shkshs i hate it the gender dysphoria lets not even stat HOWEVER if theres one thing im grateful for is the certainty that ill never be bald
edit : im non binary he/she people | I thought I’d never go bald, until I turned 22 and realised I inherited the female pattern hair loss gene HAHA. Life SUCKS 👌🏼 |
This is really frustrating, I’ll just be trying to have a normal conversation then they start talking about their vore fetish. I was fine with it at first, cool, you’re into vore no big deal, but now that every single conversation is just vore I’m stating to get less tolerant. Whenever they bring it up it feels like my cue to leave the conversation because it makes me really uncomfortable and I cannot relate to them at all. It’s not like all of the friends in this group chat are into vore either, but they’re kind of being forced into conversing about it. I just want to talk to my friends, not to discuss vore. I’m regretting saying I was fine with it. Maybe I’m just being an asshole who doesn’t let others share their interests, who knows. I barely talk to anyone as it is and this feels like I’m being robbed of my time I get to talk to my friends. It makes me feel kind of lonely, and like an outcast from our group. It’d be nice to vent to my friends as well, but of course I’m too non confrontational to do such a thing.
Edit: maybe it’s a bit late, but if you don’t know what vore is do not search it up, you’ve been warned. | Idk at most I'll crack one joke about something sexual or kink around people I specifically know would find it funny and then move on. We don't need a whole ass conversation about it, especially in mixed company. |
I don’t understand why people can’t respect your time. I fathom when emergencies come up and shit changes that is completely fine. But do not agree to a time and have me waiting for your bitch ass cause you’re not able to wake up. If you agree to something stick with your word. Not everyone has all day to wait for your ass who’s still in bed while I’m driving to come see you and the you drop the bomb can you come an hour later?? Like fuck can people just respect other peoples time?? So irritating. | Totally get that. Pisses me off. You make the effort to mentally prepare for the day, might actually get ready and are there, only for them to not show up. Unbelievable. I hate leaving the house, so if that happened on TOP of how frustrated I’d already be with the prospect of not being home, god that’d drive me wild! Get what you’re saying completely - flakiness is infuriating. |
Racism has literally existed for generations, and has been propagated by all sorts of people.
I'm half Latino and half Asian myself, and I've seen members of both communities behave horribly racist in many circumstances. Wether it was the thousands of Chinese brigading against all black people online, or the Latinos in my own community leveling unjust criticism and racism specifically towards members of my community with fairer skin. I've heard my own Japanese family members make insulting and blatantly racist remarks regarding Chinese people. None of its ok, ever.
I used to help out at schools with young kids, and when I saw a little black girl and her friends harassing a smaller, white girl because she was white, I nearly lost my cool altogether. I don't know if these parents are teaching their kids that it's ok to be racist to white people because of what many white people did decades ago, but it's absolutely disgusting.
When I hear the phrases "you can't be racist towards white people" or "X race cannot be racist," I think it's just purely divisive and only pushes our country farther back in time. "White people are the oppressors," lmao no white person is oppressing you today, shut your entitled ass up. You wanna see oppression? Take a look at The Holocaust, or how blacks were treated in the 18 and 1900s, not today.
There are numerous official definitions of racism, and none of them say that to be racist, your race has to have institutional power.
The prejudice argument is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. "No, X people can't be racist but we can be prejudiced." Lmao stfu, the definition literally says that racism is a form of prejudice directed towards somebody because of their race. Racism is just a more specific form of prejudice. I understand that people are kind of convinced into this line of thinking based on articles filled with mental gymnastics, but its pure bs.
End of rant, thanks for reading if you got this far. | Agreed.
Merriam-Webster definition of racism: “a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race.”
Racism goes ALL ways. And I don’t think anything is gonna be peaceful until we all accept that. Thanks for posting this. I’m sure you’ll get hate, but you’re speaking the truth. Have a great day. |
I saw a video the other day of a guy beating a dog with a stick. It disgusts me. If I ran a dictatorship, animal abuse would be punished by getting your face flayed, your eyelids cut off and being drowned in boiling salt water. If you abuse animals, I wish you a slow, drawn-out, torturous, merciless death after a seemingly unending, dull existence of never-ending failure and misfortune.
Edit: I didn’t come here to get more angry from having to argue with a bunch of vegans. Stop picking a fight. | Omg do not watch those videos! I am with you there though. Animal abusers are psychopathic cowards |
SORRY IF THIS OFENDS ANYONE.
This single mom I know put up a quote “ I asked god to send me a man who would really love me so he sent me a son”
Um what in the actual fuck? That is one fucked up reason to have a baby . A baby will not save you from your misery. If you have a shitty love life having a baby isn’t a solution to that.
And no it is not your child’s responsibility to make you happy. Your son will grow up to have a life of their own and they will choose to love you or not, they are not obligated to anything.
Im really tired of these stupid quotes that are made to make these moms feel better about their shitty choices. | I feel like my kid saved my life, but not in the sense that that was her job/responsibility. She gave me someone to do better for(when myself wasn't an option). Because of her, I wanted to heal my mental wounds and become more than someone that was chronically depressed and borderline functional. I got counseling and a diagnosis and have been working towards letting go of the past and long-held coping mechanisms. Now, I do it for me, because I can see my worth. Maybe it's more "the responsibility of being a parent" saved me. I can't imagine expecting your child to support you, emotionally, and thinking that God intended this for your child. |
I'm a female who unfortunately lives in America, sterilized after Roe v Wade overturned but holy FUDGE we are screwed if Trump gets in again and Project 2025 is enacted. Just came to scream into the void :c | My concern is that we treat each other like enemies instead of neighbors with different opinions. Our country has become so divided that idk if there is a way to reconcile the differences. I think America has been screwed since 2016, if not earlier, and it's because we as citizens have played into the political theater and let them turn us against each other for their gain. |
I (F31) have a son (M13)with physical disabilities. In A relationship with a very wounded person (M31) who’s angry that my son’s dad doesn’t take him 50% of the time. Never has never will. Lives an hour away. During a huge fight we had, he said he should not be expected to take care of my son because that’s his dad’s responsibility.
(He left him home alone laying in his bed while I dropped off OUR (m4) son at school— a 20 minute drive away. ) a story for another time.
I said if I’m not home, as my partner of 8 years, he is in charge of making sure he’s okay, fed, safe etc. And he said he should not be responsible for someone else’s ejaculation that I helped the man have. (His verbiage)
So I’m hurt, heartbroken and just weary.
He won’t leave, I don’t wanna leave this house as it’s accessible for my son, but he won’t leave. I’m out of options.and I’m getting physically sick from this
Just crying my eyes out while I work now. I feel sick. He says I don’t deserve anyone because I had a kid with someone else. I wish he’d leave already.
Edit: thank you to everyone who has responded and I wanted to provide more insight.
We have only been living together for 1 year. we lived at my parents from 2019-2021 and he got kicked out for his anger management issues.
I realize it’s gotten worse from here and I have told him that he needs to leave as soon as possible.
I cannot go back to my parents house because it’s much too small to hold us comfortably / it is not accessible for my older son to live in. (Our current rental has a ramp and the lease expires next April) I’m unable to pay for the house alone because I do not make enough and rent is $2600
I have looked into state resources, I would require proof of emotional abuse which I have years of in a note backed up on my cloud and then begin a case. In terms of assistance, with an overly expensive county to live in that’s overcrowded. All home assistance resources are on a waitlist of over 4 years. I have been on one for 5 years and still waiting.
I realize something has to be done, I’ve told him that he has to leave and he has agreed — I’m worn out and exhausted from the fighting, but also the care giving. My older son is 100% dependent on me.
| Honestly at this point you need to do what you have to to protect your child. Don’t subject your child to that disgusting treatment. If he’d heard imagine how he would’ve felt. It’s a tough thing to do but I truly don’t see your current partner as willing to take care of him the older he gets, especially if he feels that way. Leave him
(I just checked your profile and noticed this isn’t the first time you’ve posted about him. In fact you’ve been posting about him for years. As a parent your feelings of love for him don’t matter since he clearly doesn’t give two fucks about your disabled son. You stay with this man why? Bc you love him? If something happened to you does he love you enough to take care of the son he left lying in bed helpless? It truly doesn’t sound like it. This is gonna make me feel like an ass but you’ve gotta quit with the selfish victim mentality and put the child that needs you first. You’ve let this man live with you the last 4 years and he talks like that? Anyone who disrespects my flesh and blood would’ve been out in less than half that time. You’ve got an obligation to step up and do what’s right. Terrifying example, if he was abusing your son and you continued to let him stay there you would be an accessory to the abuse, not another victim, solely based on the fact that you knew this behavior was going on long term but did nothing to stop it. Imagine if something happened during the time that he left him lying in bed helpless, if something happened to that child you would both be slapped with neglect charges. Finally, use Reddit as a steppingstone to take initiative and do the right thing instead of just wishing he was better. It sucks, but sometimes people don’t change. It’s important to be a good partner, but even more important to be a good parent) |
I live in a country with a 99.9% immunisation vaccination rate, which means the entire population is given the essential vaccines by the government when they are young. We have free healthcare here and a successful immunisation program, which led to the eradication of many communicable diseases including measles, rubella and malaria.
We are also heavily dependent on tourism and as a developing country we’ve started putting forward the best interests of foreign tourists; this has started to backfire on us because one of the eradicated diseases, measles, has now started spreading across the country. Since it was eradicated, it’s obviously not from locals but idiotic foreigners who come here unvaccinated, carrying the diseases inside them and in their children, which is now spreading to our children and immunocompromised people.
Although we thankfully have a healthcare system which could hopefully tackle this, why don’t foreign travellers read more about the country before they visit and understand that they could be potentially carrying a disease that’s been fully eradicated here? If they are anti-vaxx, then why travel abroad to poorer countries carrying their diseases? I remember myself going to a western country and being called a “virus”, a “disease” while these actually disease infested people could freely go around spreading it everywhere.
I’ve received all my vaccines as a child. My whole family did, all my friends at school did. So had every single person I know. And we’re actually doing fine. Please don’t travel to other countries if you are potentially a disease carrier. | I agree. These are diseases that are easily prevented from spreading if they would get vaccinated. Anti-vaxxers are frustrating. Trying to talk to many of them to explain the benefits of vaccines is like talking to a brick wall. There are ones who will eventually listen but most are conspiracy theorists. |
Seriously, when the FUCK did everything become a god damn subscription service, and I’m not talking about streaming services like Netflix or Hulu...
Want to buy sustainable cleaning products for your house from Grove or whatever the hell its called??? Monthly subscription required! Want to buy an app to do yoga or meditation so you don’t lose your god damn marbles during this bullshit year? Drop that fucking credit card info! Want to spend $2200 on a god damn rowing machine for all this weight you gained during quarantine? Monthly membership required! Want to buy some of Rihanna’s underwear? VIP membership is a thousand times cheaper... and why? MONTHLY SUBSCRIPTION BABY. Cheap exercise clothes? You guessed it, another FUCKING subscription! Sure you can skip months on some of these if you catch it in time but straight up who the fuck can keep track?!
It’s honestly so damn annoying... I would rather pay one more expensive fee one fucking time and be done with it!!!!!!!!!!!! | Seriously, everything is a subscription service now .
Want to buy pet food/toys ? Buy a subscription to chewy.com
Want to watch indie horror movies? Buy a subscription to shudder.com
Want to start online dating ? Buy a subscription to OurTime.com
Ever since Netflix and Hulu became successful with their streaming services, every TV cable network wants to have a streaming service now (no NBC, I don't want to buy a year long subscription to Peacock for the 50th time !!!) |
As a bible reading, Jesus loving & God fearing Christian it makes my blood boil and heart break to see so many “fellow Christians” defend racism, spout “All Lives Matter” and say that Trump is anointed by God. There is NOTHING Christ like about that man!! As Christians we are supposed to REFLECT God in us- these folks are not reflecting Jesus Christ...
We’re commanded to love each other as Christ loves us and realize that we (humans) are ALL made in the image of God. No one is above the other, we’re all apart of one body and need eachother. It breaks my heart to see more of the enemy (satan) in people who claim to love God than God Himself. | Fellow Christian that agrees. Beware of false prophets- people seem to be forgetting that. |
Right before I went to bed last night I came home with pack of 20 cans of Sprite. I wanted to save the soda so it could cool over night so I slept without anything to drink, but this only made me wake up early from being so thirsty. To my surprise, there was no trace of the box when I went to check the fridge, which made me think I accidentally left it out somewhere in the house or in the car.
It turns out my 13 year old brother spent the last 8 hours staying up all night, playing Call of Duty while going through $20+ worth of soda. The lil shit had to drink a can every 24 minutes. When I tried to get an answer out of him all I got was "have you ever heard of being THRISTY?" I will now be investing in my own mini fridge until I can move out.
EDIT: I know I should just want to drink water. I definitely dont drink enough and that is definitely something I want to work on. | 20 cans takes me two weeks!!! That little shit would owe me money. |
i work at a starbucks and one of my coworkers is nb and has pronoun pins for everyone. i’m a trans male and took the he/him and they/them pins and put them on my hat and apron in hopes that people would notice and not refer to me with feminine terms. it didn’t work at first so i would fidget with them a bit while taking an order to hopefully draw attention to them. a lot of the time it doesn’t work and people still call me ma’am or miss. i have slight social anxiety so i never speak up with i get misgendered. but on friday, a customer came in and immediately noticed my pins without me even touching them and the conversation goes as follows:
C- customer
M- me
C- i love your pronoun pins
M- thank you, you’re, like, the first person to acknowledge them
C- well i use the same pronouns
K- nice
*we fist bump and i take their order*
M- your order will be ready soon
C- okay, thank you sir
THEY CALLED ME SIR. i know it might not seem like a big deal, but as someone who is trans and only out to my partner and a few friends (family is extremely anti- lgbtq+) being called sir made my brain reboot honestly. i stood there for a second and most likely visibly buffered and after they walked away to sit down, i had to crouch down so nobody saw me smiling like an idiot and visibly blushing. i was smiling the whole time i was making the order and when the customer came back to get it, they noticed my face was red and i told them why and they said
C- stoppp now you’re making me blush
i sadly didn’t catch their name (we don’t have to ask for names at the starbucks i work at) so if that person sees this, thank you for making me feel validated. i hope you enjoyed your pumpkin spice frappe | This is THE reason why I think everyone should just accept other people's pronouns. If people like you become this happy because someone calls you by your prefered pronouns, than where is the harm in that? Just let acceptance and love be the wholesome force it is! <3
My apologies for steering in that direction, just had to get that out! I am very happy you got your first pronoun W! You deserve it, I hope more people show you the respect you deserve, king! :) |
I heard him having phone sex with a girl during shower, while I sit in living room. I felt so torn up, and we were supposed to do some business together. Now I really couldn’t trust this guy, I broke up with him and left his house.
I know I had to get over it. However, I can’t help thinking about this, and feel so depressed.
I didn’t know a person can be so terrible. I just couldn’t believe it.
Update:
Thank you everyone for heartwarming replies …I really need them. Now I am still in a deep depression, but I will keep working towards to a better place. | I'm so sorry! He obviously wasn't the right person for you, I know, it doesn't make the situation any better. Just look at this as an opportunity to grow and learn, and I hope this doesn't affect your future relationships. |
If anyone reading thinks otherwise, please keep your opinion to yourself since it’s a fact that it’s cruel and inhumane.
Edit: I'm so glad this seems like a popular opinion and everyone commenting is kind-hearted. Also, the word chopping is much more accurate and "Cropping" is some sort of sick vain attempt to downplay slicing off body parts. Also, looking up the word "crop", the noun and verb means are drastically different. Noun is a plant for food, example corn. Verb is cutting something off of an animal, example hair or more prevalent to this post ears and tails. I digress though as the English language confession is a vent for another day. | This and with tails too! Stop chopping up dogs!!! |
As I begin typing this, it is 1:37am on my 14th birthday.
During the evening, my family and I were sitting together in the living room, when they started discussing what to do on my birthday. Right in front of me. They said something about going out to dinner in the evening. I thought *that’s fine, I’m cool with that.*
My original plan was to go out either alone or with my sisters to the mall or the city and just spend some time there. I knew I’d enjoy it whether I was alone or not.
But then my mother said that she had booked my sisters and I for an ice skating lesson during the day, therefore disrupting my original plans.
This would be totally fine, if it weren’t for the fact that my mum had brought up ice skating and ice skating lessons before and EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME I HAVE EXPRESSED MY *EXTREME* DISLIKE AND DISCOMFORT TOWARDS THAT SHIT.
I mean, who in their right mind thinks *’hey, for my daughters birthday, I should totally surprise her with the thing that I most definitely am aware of her hatred for’*????
Every time I tried to speak up against this, they would ignore me as if I don’t get the fucking right to have a say in what *I* do on *my* birthday.
Later on I did mention that I don’t want to go ice skating, but my sister just told me that it’s not up to me and I don’t have a choice in the matter, while my other sister just nodded along.
So here I am, typing this out, on the verge of tears due to the fact that the day I was waiting an entire year for has been ruined by my mother’s own wishes.
Thanks if you’ve read this far. If I’m related to you and you’re reading this (which I know won’t happen) fuck you, and don’t be surprised when I move out.
Edit: I should probably mention that I had brought up my plans to just have a nice small day out or hang out with a friend on my birthday to my mum before. She was aware of what I had planned to do.
2nd edit: I genuinely thought this post was gonna get lost but I guess not. Anyways, thank you all so much for the advice and birthday wishes. I hope you’re all aware that you’ve made my day a bit better, and I hope you have a great rest of the year. | I feel this every year, multiple times a year actually. It sucks when the people around you pretend you’re someone else and just don’t accept you. After a while you learn to ignore it. You can’t change it. I’m sorry, hopefully you’ll have a better birthday next year. |
I would like to start this off but saying I am a woman but the amount of times I’ve seen women insinuate that because a lot of men prefer women who are clean shaven they’re pedophiles or at least have pedophilic preferences because they prefer hairless women is insane and that’s just stupid argument to me I’m sorry.
I hate when I open Twitter or something and see “Men want women who are skinny, hairless, and smaller than them? Sounds like a pedophile.” or some shit like that because it’s such a reach. A fully developed thin woman who’s clean shaven looks way different than an actual child. Just because both are hairless doesn’t mean that man wants to fuck kids, y’all just want an argument to justify being hairy.
And as someone who prefers hairless men, I guess I’m pedophile because I hate the way body hair feels against me, I hate how often the hair is rough and unmanaged, I hate how after a long day body hair traps the “smells” of the day in the armpits and genitalia and how pungent it is in comparison to when there’s no hair at all. That means I want to fuck little boys according to these women’s logic.
Do I think it’s ignorant and hypocritical how men except women to be clean shaven while they’re often very hair in comparison? Yes. Is it ignorant for a lot of them to associate hairlessness with healthiness? Also yes but being a pedophile is biggest non sequitur argument I’ve heard in awhile. | I, (a woman) prefer my female partners to be hairless too. It's literally just a preference... I can't believe people equate it with something so vile. Like wtf they must be straining their arms with all that reaching |
I found out two weeks ago that my much wanted and planned pregnancy was a blighted ovum and not viable. I chose to take the pill to end my pregnancy on Friday night because nothing was happening naturally. I should have been spending this weekend curled up with tea, a heating pad, and Netflix or a good book. But instead I've spent this weekend curled up with a heating pad, tea, and my laptop, because guess what, I still have to go to work tomorrow and be present and prepared for my students. Its their first day back tomorrow, in person, so not only do I have to be prepared to teach, I have to be prepared to welcome brand new students to a brand new school, I have to have policies and procedures on place (which have changed drastically this year) and be prepared to explain these procedures and demonstrate them half a dozen times to be sure they understand. I have to be ready to help them navigate their day and the changes that masks, hand washing, personal supplies, and social distancing have made to our schools. I have to be peppy and energetic and engaging and happy and excited. And to be all of that means I need to work, plan, print, make decisions, create, and do all sorts of things to be ready for Monday, and I have to do them this weekend, because plans are literally changing by the second. They changed shortly before I left my final prep day on Friday and chances are things will have changed by tomorrow morning when I walk into the school. So here I am working and preparing and miscarrying my much wanted and already loved baby, all at the same time. While simultaneously being told I'm not worth the money I make, I'm just a glorified babysitter, I don't work hard enough, I don't deserve the summer break I get, and that I just had six months of "vacation". So please, tell me again that I don't work hard enough, and I'm not worth the salary I earn. Anyone else with six years of post secondary education would never be told their not worth their salary. I just love hearing the opinions of people whose only experience with the education system was as a student. | Who could even think that that is an appropriate thing to say to a teacher? You guys are so important to society and to people as individuals! You aren’t glorified babysitters and you sure shouldn’t be expected to be at 100% while in the middle of pandemic and going through everything you’ve gone through. Seriously, best of luck to you and I’m so sorry that people would act that way. |
I don’t know how else to word this so sorry
I’m autistic and I’ve had my fare share of.... Weird, random, bullshit from people
My mom asked me to watch some movies a few years ago and I was like sure. The movies were “autistic themed” movies and she wanted to watch them with me to just see my reaction to them. They were both pretty awful so of course I was like “Haha these movies sucked.” and she got mad at me! She was like “Why aren’t you excited to see autistic representation?!?! How dare you call these movies awful!!” And she actually “bragged” to others how much of a “traitor” I was to the autistic community. I called them awful because they were, They were cliche, treated autism like a disease, and they fucking sucked. The first movie was about a girl who grew up on a ranch, she moved to the city and she kept wanting to fuck cows (you read that right) and had a meltdown because the school said that she couldn’t fuck cows and bring them to her dorm room to fuck them. The rest of the movie was basically “Just let the dumb autistic woman fuck the animal she doesn’t know any better” like what the fuck??? That’s so fucking horrible. The second movie was about another girl who was obsessed with star trek. She was basically sheltered all her life for no reason, so when she got lost somewhere in the country it’s like her brain fell out of her head. She all of the sudden didn’t know how to use a phone (she had one before this happened), got robbed, and was basically “acting stupid” until she got back. They both sucked, and i’m not a “traitor” for thinking otherwise.
If you’re confused about the title, you know how when another dog sees another dog and is uncontrollably happy and excited? Well that’s what the title is referring to
EDIT: The first movie is NOT about a girl named Temple. The movie was low budget and shitty. From what I remember, she had tried to breed a cow in her college dorm room. | Damn that’s rough I’m sorry. There’s a lot of bullshit out there surrounding autism and whatnot and it’s good you told your mom the movies were shit |
Some time ago I posted something I invested alot of thought and effort to, that post got gold. I was the fucking proudest in the world for that achievement, and the 100 coins I got were like a prize I appreciated deeply as it represented something I made that a stranger liked enough to give gold to.
But now the entirety of Reddit is flooding of memes about people getting 100, 250 or 500 coins for fucking UPVOTING, something I do all the fucking time. This makes me feel so, useless, like Reddit values more people pressing a button on alot of posts of shit other people made than the people who actually put effort into shit. It makes me feel like stuff I post are shit, Reddit would prefer it if you were to just stick to lurking, contributing content is less important.
Also, I always upvote everything I like, which is most posts, how do they decide who gets it? Is it people who upvote everything they see? I sure hope not, I would believe Reddit would want posts of quality to be those that get alot of points.
This entire thing just seems out of nowhere and in it's core dumb. What were Reddit thinking? "Why don't we give some random people shit that's worth actual money for doing something that almost everyone does, but only for them, as a thank you. What about everyone else who does that? Oh, fuck em!"? Seriously this is like they were drunk, it's like a teacher would give bonus points to random students who did homework as a good-job-for-the-hard-work prize, but give nothing to others who did their homework.
Fuck Reddit for this honestly... | I have two questions for you OP:
1. Why do you care what other people get?
2. Is that why you're on Reddit, to get coins and gold stars? |
My first post got removed because it was too short. So you know what? I'll describe it.
I've had a crush on my professor for a year now. I get distracted by other women every now and then but SOMEHOW. I. ALWAYS. THINK. ABOUT. FUCKING HER. WHAT THE HELL.
LIKE NO BRO this shit isn't normal, I've been trying to sleep for the past half an hour and all I could think about is railing her from behind.
You wanna know some good shit? She probably knows. Nah, she definitely knows. I've been trying to act more "professional" and I pretty much hide it in class, but fuck man. _WHY DO I WANNA RAIL HER SO BAD?_
No other woman that I barely know has ever had this kind of power over me yo. What the fuck. Seriously. | I’ve had hot teachers throughout High-School and College and guess what I even have hot co-workers. The reality of the situation is that you should just focus on what she’s teaching rather than fucking her cause it ain’t gonna happen brotha. |
It's been super hot where I am and though I do have an ac in my room I hate the feeling of air blowing on me so iv been sleeping nude. I always make sure my door is closed, my blanket is covering my body and I put clothes on if I leave my room in the middle of the night. But recently my mom learned about this and has been getting mad at me and shaming me for it and I don't know why. She tells me to just wear a t-shirt and shorts but not only do I hate the feeling of shorts when I'm trying to sleep bc iys just uncomfortable but it's hot and I keep telling her that and she keeps giving me dirty looks and openly getting mad at me for it, she has never walked in on me exposed in my room though so I don't know where this is coming from. I just kinda hit the part of puberty where stuff starts happening physically so maybe that's why but she doesn't seem to care about walking in on me in the bathroom or when I'm showering because "were all girls here" yet she suddenly has an issue when it's in my own room. I thought maybe she was concerned that I would do this other places like my dad's house or a friends house but I told her that I don't and I litterly will not ever. For reference my mom's house has me, my mom, and my 2 sisters living there. I'm also 14 afab. | Odd to be shamed the same way we were born….
#NAKED |
i accidently came across my old classmates instagram profile and ir made me so fucking jealous. she has everything that i wanted.
she has her own apartment, goes on trips, has the best figure, the best clothes, her parents support her financially, she's pretty, has damn clear skin and most important of all she has so many friends.
it makes me so mad that the chance of me being like her was taken away from me. maybe i wouldn't be exactly like her but i could live alone move to be near my university. i could be able to go to the gxm and work out and have a good figure. she has so many friends because she's pretty.
don't come at me with "having many friends doesn't mean they're real" i don't care about that. i don't have a n y. i don't care to have fale friends. is she having fun with them? yes.
meanwhile i sit at home all day long and don't have a social life.
my fucking old highschool class went on a trip to italy together. they had the most wonderful friendship, all of them together. except one person and that was me.
i fucking hate everyone and everything.
i wish i would not feel this kind of jealous again.
edit: just to be clear, i just wanted to vent and to get it off my chest :)
and there are reasons i said "this chance was taken away from me", mostly because of my strict parents, but i just didn't want to explain my whole life story here.
and thank you all for the encouraging/nice comments! i feel a lot better now ^^ | Been there dude. It sucks ass. Social media is a cancer. |
i had those videos and pictures from a long time now... i always been alone and needy, and those were my only way to feel a bit of pleasure in my life. i tried to do that many times in the past, but i always got to download it again and again. but now my depression just got deeper and i lost interest in those things, and i didn't felt any pleasure anyways, it was just for relieving the bulge i get sometimes when i go to sleep.
i took a time from everything in my life for a week now, and i changed some things in my life or just started changing it, and that is something that must be done. i'm pretty sure i will miss them sometimes, but fuck it, i will just move on and that's it | Aww , I hope you get better , I wish you the best 🫶🏻 |
Yesterday at dawn she and I had sex and she had never said anything about it. It's not like I care about her being trans, she's so nice and hot, I'm not saying she should have told me right away when we met or when we started dating, but she should have at least mentioned it earlier in some conversation so I could have time to learn a little about how to suck a dick
Edit why are people saying she lied? She never said she was cis. Lying is different from omitting. Yes she should have told me but no she didn't lied | >she should have at least mentioned it earlier in some conversation so I could have time to learn a little about how to suck a dick
I'm laughing way harder at this than I should be...I take comfort in the fact that I'm 99% sure this isn't a real story. |
Trigger warning: SA, r-pe, abuse
Edit 3 for clarification: no I didnt like randomly bring it up while we where talking about past traumas. I was venting about how I feel like I would be like my parents, what if I become them..?! Oh god what if I hit them?! What would you do then?! I was very emotional and panicked and almost having a panic attack at this thoughts. So I wasn’t thinking clearly when I was talking and was just anxiety spraying thoughts.
I asked my boyfriend what would he do if I happen to hurt any future kid we might have after talking about the abuse I went through as a kid.. because I was curious and wondered if he would come to the aid of his kid and how him and I would be after words because this stuff happened I did not think about it much.. I really wish I didn’t ask… because what he said has shocked me and is putting me through a ptsd ep. This is the following conversation:
Me: What would you do if I hurt our kids? Like let’s say I’ve never done this before and this randomly happens maybe a moment of anger, what would you do? (Of corse I wouldn’t hurt any kids I might have)
Him: well, I wouldn’t kill you. But you hurt my kid so… I would take you down to the basement and use you, basically turn you into a “toy”. And no one will hear from you again.
Me: use me? Toy? Wdym by that?
Him: well, sex or how I see pleased
Me: wait so you are basically going to r-pe me for the rest of my life for hitting the kid by accident/out of anger most likely by mistake and I would feel after?(again I would never)
Him: yep, and to make sure you don’t get pregnant I’ll shove plan B down your throat.
Me: …. What if I started to cry?
Him: well you are the love of my life but crying is a turn off so
His now asking what’s wrong and why I seem upset at him. I’m at a lost of words… I was r-ped as a kid so this hurts so badly…. Well now his saying he would hit me back or whip me HARD….. what do I do what do I say how should I feel besides scared….? I only asked him this because I just wanted to know how that might effect our relationship etc etc. . . I’m so fucking scared for my future with him… after learning this…. This feels so made up or some type of crazy movie… but no… I wish it was though…
Thank you for listening reader.
Edit: for those who find my question Weird I’m in the spectrum, I will ask him random questions like “what frog do you think you’d be?” Or something like that. Also I didn’t ask randomly I was talking about being scared of what if I am a bad parent bla bla bla, yes I’m getting therapy, no his not, he has refused to go to therapy.
Edit 2: He never acted like this, tell now. I might post a update. I’ll remove this post after the update probably a day later because this is a burner account and he follows my main
Edit 4: now that I’m reflecting I’ve starting to notice that he makes little comments about my body… good and bad… like my chest… he’ll say I have boobies when I say they look flat then the next minute will say “hey you prove that the earth is flat” … I’m starting to rethink this hole relationship…
A small update for you guys tell I can post the full update: I’m texting him now, I’ll post proof as well of the text conversation. I feel like I’m in a messed up book or horror movie right now
Real update; so this thread doesn’t allow images. But basically he said it because (I copy and pasted his message to me): “Because I always hated those who abuse their own, so I kinda went to the extreme.” And “My step dad didn't help, not the one you know, the one I grew up with, I'm sorry I went to the extreme I just had some personal things I forgot I had”
He said he wants to “wait another year before he gets therapy” and because “he wants one more year to be normal one more year” …
Well I asked him why he thought he it was ok to say that and he said (again copy and pasted from the conversation) “I… don’t… know”
And he just kept saying “I’m sorry” … uhm you can’t just say sorry after saying something so cold.
He’s goes silent when I mentioned when he gets a little physically and stuff. So uhm… not the best update and if anyone want to read the messages just Dm me, I guess?
Edit: he kept apologizing after I told him he distorted my trust and the safety I felt with him.
Another small update: I followed your guys advice and went to my mom because she went through something similar with my bio-dad… and uhm… she said that “I understand that it hurt you but you need to go apologize to him for telling him.. he destroyed your trust and safety, that’s going a little far *my name*” and “you too shouldn’t have as that conversation you to are to young.” (Im adult in my 20s)
…
So
Uhm…
I don’t why I thought my mom would help me in this she always pushed my feelings aside as a kid and would yell and me for having feelings, I thought she would change now that I’m a adult.. uhm no I was wrong, very wrong.
I don’t know what’s more messed up.
My mom telling me to apologize to my boyfriend after he told me he would r-pe and I told him he destroyed and to apologize because it “hurt his feelings”
Or
What my boyfriend said…
Edit: thank you guys for the ones who commented and Dm me I appreciate the support.
And thank you for opening my eyes! ❤️
I heard story’s like this gets on ticktock my friends say, I don’t have ticktock so I don’t know how true this is or not. But anyways, thank you guys so much for the support and to the people who think I’m trying to “farm Karma” and that this isn’t real and there’s no way a person would say that, sorry to break your personal bubble, but this stuff happens in real life and not just your weird “smut” book where this only happens.
Also I want to add real fast why I made a post about this is because I told one of my friends and they said to post it to Reddit to get my eyes open about him, they where right.
Mini update: yes I’m still with him, his getting therapy, I’m refusing to see him, love him, or touch him. I’m staying because my moms forcing me too because of my collage funds.. wish me luck | He told you who he is. No one would say that even as a joke. You need to leave him. Please don't write this off as him joking. |
I understand there are double standards with everything but I’ve always wondered why a multitude of women condescend upon men that aren’t hung like a bull elephant. And then will complain when women are body shamed. Neither are ok but what really bothers me is men cannot control the size of their penis. I’ve never been personally shamed for it (and no I do not have a big penis), but it still bothers me because I see it—mainly on social media— a lot. | Tons of memes shitting on women for having large labia…. Beef curtains, arbys, etc. it’s dumb. Everyone sucks. The end |
My state is currently under one and my aunts bf got upset and repeatedly asked a employee, right after entering the store, if the mandate was a law and that he wouldn’t or can’t wear a mask due to his COPD. He then left after they said it wasn’t a law and that it’s a mask mandate issued by the governor. Just why? Covid-19 is real and wearing a mask is your civic duty. Wearing a mask for ten minutes to browse for a game isn’t going to hurt. After I came back out of the store, as I wanted to look for drawing tablets, he apologizes for embarrassing me. :/
Please don’t bring politics into this if you’re going to comment. I’m just upset rn that someone I thought I could trust doesn’t believe in science and safety. | People are fucking morons. There is a reason we wear them, if we never bothered?
We would be up shit creek, this type of thing can adapt when it's had a chance to survive through enough hosts and would develop a defense against our immune system.
As if the people that have died already weren't enough of a sign.
"Well it's still a very low mortality rate."
Yeah and you dumb fucks are giving this thing every chance to spread, mutate and become more deadly or more easily transferable from host to host.
But sure just walk in without a mask and sneeze into all of our mouths because you a special snowflake who shouldn't have to wear one because it's a mild inconvenience to you.
(Coming from someone who's basically blind from glasses falling off from the mask or fogging them up and being unable to see for at least 10 hours a day)
It's inconvenient and even irrating yes, but grow the fuck up man. Like is this what a intelligent species does when an actual EPIDEMIC happens!?
Nah let's not follow protocol for the safety of others because you can't be bothered to wear a fucking mask.
People would have KILLED for masks during the black plague, jesus fucking christ. |
It's so hard. It's so god dammned hard at times. | Keep up the good work, you can do it! Stay strong, especially in times like these! You got this! |
She broke up with me the day before my birthday, like a couple weeks ago. I thought I could handle it, but these past few days have been absolutely crushing me.
I genuinely loved her with everything I had. We had been struggling these past 2 months, with me sacrificing a huge amount (driving the 50 mins to her house, paying for everything, no sexual activity) in order to help her mental state (she has a medical condition affecting fatigue, depression). I didn't care that it was alot for me, because she was worth it. I don't regret anything I did.
She told me I was the most loving, caring, and most kind hearted person she had ever met. She was just unhappy in the relationship, and needs time to figure herself out.
I respect her decision completely, even if it makes me incredibly depressed
So here I am, posting on Reddit, in absolute decay because the most perfect girl in the world doesn't want me anymore. Someone, make it make sense. I genuinely don't know how I'm going to move on from this...
*Edit: Hey everyone. I just wanted to give a huge thanks to everybody who has commented wishing me well after this shift in my life. I couldn't have imagined the kind, comforting and overwhelming warm response each and every one of you has expressed to me in this trying time.
I've decided to restrict her account on insta (the main way we communicated), and have muted the app, as to keep it out of my mind on my phone. It's not a big step, but it's progress in getting her out of my mind and focusing on myself.
I'm going to start embracing my hobby of guitar building by joining a luthier workshop in my city to keep me happy and occupied.
I've also booked an appointment with my therapist this week so I can start delving into the reasons why I'm feeling so negative about the situation, to better myself for my future partner.
Again, thank you everyone for your kind words. I was left speechless when she left me, telling myself I couldn't believe this is happening. Now I'm repeating those words to myself in a much happier, and self-affirming way. Thank you ❤️ | I'm so sorry.
My husband walked out on me a week after I almost died giving birth to our third child. I bled out on the table and flat lined twice.
Never felt so much pain. It hurts. I loved him with everything I had. I would always find others attractive in Relationships in the past, but with him, that all changed. I felt like he was my one. He was the most handsome, wRmest and sweetest man in my eyes.. until he just wasn't anymore. I'm a 26 year old single Mother of 3 who takes care of her disabled father as well. It fucking hurts so bad and I'm so sorry you have to feel this pain. |
I am lucky enough to be in a country where abortions are semi-legal. Like we have limits as to when have an abortion depending on the reason. If I remember correctly you can have an abortion for any reason up ti 12 week, maybe less. I'm not sure, but I remember it's like that. It's fair.
But with everything happening in the US every one thought that they should voice their opinion in every conversation and they kept telling me "You don't want a baby, don't have sex until you want one." and my boyfriend "Watch where you shove your dick, or even better don't fuck."
If in your moral compass you believe that you shouldn't have sex because you don't want a kid, fine. Do you, but don't force your beliefs on me and act like you're smarter. You are not. I just like sex, and the people who told that were both men who never had sex before and told us that watching shows were stupid and we should practise out skills instead of that.
Don't try to dictate another's life just because you think you are living "correctly". You are not. No one is. I'll stick to my shows and my sex life.
Edit: I removed the sentence including the word "facist". I now realise it was not used properly and I apologise. I was in the heat of the moment and I was not thinking straight. I'm sorry. | i'm sick of it too because the people who say "don't have sex if you don't want to get pregnant" are the same people to complain about their girlfriends no longer wanting to have sex |
my mum had SIX CHILDREN before being allowed to get her tubes tied, and they still asked “what if your husband in the future wants a baby?” she wasn’t even married.
i do not want children. i will never want children. and i hate this hormonal birth control; it kills my sex drive and makes me depressed as shit. but nope, i’m probably going to have to wait until my late 20’s to get my tubes tied at the LEAST.
why am i not allowed to do this? if i want a child so bad, i will adopt. this is the choice i want to make, and frankly i don’t care if i regret it.
i’d rather regret not having a child, than have a child i don’t want. babies are not the “goal” of all women’s lives. i’m more than just a fucking baby incubator. plenty of women want kids, but i don’t. i don’t understand why it’s a big deal? | It's all about that control |
It hurts my ears and fries my brain. So overused, esp in carrolling dances/presentations. I hate it bordering disgusted ugh | I work at Walmart. Imagine how I feel. |
So fucking much.
I just got engaged. He should be here for that. He should be here to walk his first daughter down the fucking aisle. He should be here to dance with me on my wedding night.
He should just fucking be here.
Fuck cancer. | I’m sorry for what you are going through.. just know that his presence was there even if you felt it or not. Wish you nothing but the best <3 |
i’m a guy and i know 100% for a fact that other men will say “it should have been me” or “i would’ve enjoyed it” but i just want to feel loved and comfortable. i want a real genuine relationship and my ex girlfriend made me feel like that sometimes, but she always wanted sex. i remember we were supposed to be with my family and i kept telling her “i don’t know, not right now” and things like that and she kept saying “it’ll be quick” and she just wouldn’t stop insisting until it happened. she would always do this kind of thing, she wouldn’t take no for an answer. she just did whatever she wanted to and it made me hate myself. she would say “i feel like you don’t love me” if i turned her down. i didn’t even think it was wrong at the time because i was told i should like it. i just want to be loved and appreciated.
| Unwanted sex and sex where one party doesn't take no for an answer and does whatever they want anyway is called RAPE.
Gender is irrelevant. |
i [25F) am dealing with a "dirty" boyfriend [38M]. he won't brush his teeth unless i do it infront of him and he won't shower unless i complain about it. i have constantly hinted to him that cleanliness is important... honestly it's stressing our intimate relationship because i refuse to have sex with him if i know he hasn't showered. it's really hard to say anything to him about it because he throws temper tantrums constantly saying "i'm not two years old, i know how to take care of myself" when obviously...he doesn't. it's disgusting | How does it feel to be a mommy to a man 13 years older than you?
Dump him. You can do better. You deserve better. He can't even take care of himself. |
I really hate how I can’t talk about my interests without someone acting like i’m obsessed. I brought up how I wanted to see a specific movie twice over the course of a week because i loved the book and it just so happens one of the actors is a musician I like, and the other night we were talking about it and that person told the group we were with that I watched the trailer so many times. Which is a literal lie and when I said that she went “suuuure” it’s just so fucking annoying. We are literally adults, stop acting like teenagers. It just sucks because it keeps me from wanting to ever talk about things that I like or enjoy because people always have to play it off like I have some weird obsession. It’s ironic too because it only ever has to do with music or TV interests. I’m an avid sports fan and no one has ever been like “hmm i think you talk about football a little too much”. | Keep being you and stay proud!
We only get one life so we should let people cling to whatever makes them happy and not be so judgy.
If someone's interest seems silly or like a waste of time to you then big deal, some of your interests will seem like silly wastes of time to others too. Live and let live, etc. |
I don't mean to hate on my roomate- I understand we come from different backgrounds and families. But sometimes her privilege makes me want to scream.
I am a junior in college and she is a senior. She has all her rent paid by her parents, and has a job that is more or less a hobby than a necessity. I had to leave my family when I was 19, and have to pay for rent, car gas, food, and any educational stuff by myself (including my loans.) I am not angry at that fact, and I'm proud of myself to be able to handle such responsibilities. I have never had a late bill, and I have been able to pay around 9k off in loans while still pursing my bachelors.
But sometimes I wish we could switch places for the day. For one day, I want to be the girl who didn't see much suffering growing up. I want to be the girl whose family supports her 100%, and who never saw financial hardship. I want to be the girl who doesn't have to work 2 jobs just to put myself through college, or the girl who stays up late, constantly running numbers to make sure I don't drown financially.
For example: I have been working on bettering my credit since freshman year. I have never missed a payment, pay extra on my loans when I can, and sometimes pay months in advance for rent. In order to do this, I have had to make alot of sacrifices- from working 60/hrs a week one summer to denying myself basic pleasures in order to put that money towards debt . My credit is finally at a number that I like, and I decided to share that with my roomate out of pride for myself. She didn't even know what a credit score was, yet once she pulled up her own, it was the exact same as mine. How can someone who rarely pays their own bills have the same credit score as a dedicated bill payer?
She doesn't really even seem to understand that *you need to have a job in order to pay for things*. I had lost my two jobs due to COVID, and I am praying to get a new one as a testing assistant on my campus. When I told her I would most likely be working 20 hours a week while balancing school and an internship, she just said, "that kinda seems like alot for you to handle in one semester." No shit, Sherlock, are you just noticing now that I'm constantly struggling? And when I take her grocery shopping (she doesn't have a car, I do) she aimlessly throws shit into her cart, quite literally saying, "I'll just get my dad/grandma to send me some money."
I should also state that don't pay fully for my own things every month. My middle-class mother pays for my car payments and health insurance because she is an amazing and kind woman. But due to the tension among other family members, I always have to be prepared for even that aid to be taken away. And in a couple years, I'll be on my own completely anyways.
I guess if my roommate would just admit she is privileged, it would make me feel a little better. But she thinks because she occasionaly puts a hundred dollars towards her own rent, she is a hustler. It just kinda makes my blood boil.
Edit: I am sorry to the people who have taken offense at this post. I feel like I should clarify some things:
-the only reason why I have a car or health insurance is because of my mother. The reason behind this is because if it was up to my father, I would be homeless or worse right now. This is a fact of life that I just have to deal with.
-my mother has recently been having extreme "pain attacks" that have caused her to go to the ER three times during the pandemic. She is having surgery soon to remove gallstones. I am three hours away, unable to visit due to COVID, and she is the absolute best thing in my life. I wish I could take all of her pain away, or put it on myself.
-I am sorry if I offended you. I just need a place to vent, and just thinking through this situation more, I guess I am more worried about my mother. I am very scared of losing her, and I shouldn't be putting that on my roommate. | I’m sorry you feel that way, but I totally understand. I grew up in a similar demeanor, and actually ended up dropping out of college because I couldn’t afford it anymore. It broke my heart and I wondered why everyday. Why couldn’t my family have money? Why did I have to pay for college myself? Or even in general? But you have to come to realize that everything happens for a reason. It took me a long time to see that reason, but I’ve learned a lot not having money that people who do never learn. I’ve learned responsibility, I know the concept of a dollar. I think twice before I leave that last piece of food on my plate and often give as much as I can because I know what it’s like to be without. As much as it really sucks to always be broke especially in a time where jobs are slim, it also feels good to sleep a night knowing that in a way your better and stronger, more resilient and perseverant. You know a strength you’re roommate never will. You won’t have a rude awakening in the real world, and at the end of the day you’d be more likely to survive a zombie apocalypse. |
I 22F and my partner 22M have been dating for 8 years and are due to get married soon. About 6 months ago it was revealed that early unmonitored acess to the internet as children resulted in my partner age 9 at the time and his sister age 5 at the time to start doing NSFW stuff together. I won't go into details but it's important to note that it happened 5 times and all 5 times were touching and oral only. This got thane to court were my partner and his sister both told almost identical stories about what happened and that they were influenced by what they were seeing online to do this and it stopped when his sister verbalised she was becoming uncomfortable. My partner did not get any jail time and was given 3 years good behaviour and was not placed on the sex offenders register as in my state anyone under age 10 cannot legally be held accountable for this type of crime.
From then to now iv been grappling with my morality on the situation, to be honest I had been coming up with a plan yo leave him as I feel disgusted by his actions and betrayed that he his things from me. I was talking with my therapist and was told I was over reacting and that my partner was only a child with no sense that what he was doing wasn't ok.
My therapist told me to wait and take more time to process before leaving him because in her eyes he was also a victim of the internet and grooming. Well Iv been thinking and 6 months later I'm still not sure what to do. His sister doesn't talk to us any more. The last we hered from her was a relayed message threw her parents that while she loved us seeing us is a trigger for her and brings back trauma, thus we have respected her and remained no contact. My family are aware of this as well and agree with my therapist and my siblings do too, I appear to be the only one having second thoughts and I think it's because I expressed CSA myself. I feel like I'm crazy and have no idea what I'm going to do next. I feel stagnant and lost grappling with my own morality and trying to figure out if I'm wrong for how I feel. | A little note: his sister remembers what happened as a trauma, but I bet €10 that it's not so different for him, too.
You're looking at him as a culprit with a justification (meaning that he did things but is not guilty). You don't accuse him, but you're forgetting the reality (which even the court agrees with)
The reality is that he's a victim too, and has either gone ahead of it, or is hiding his distress about it
Edit just to double down: your plan to leave him is the proof that hiding it from you was a good idea. Imagine him writing it in a dating profile or on a curriculum/lebenslauf/whatever it is called in your country. Of course he doesn't talk about it
What icks me the most of this post, However, is how you're turning this into your issue. You have nothing to do with it, you're the embodiment of the saying "if a man opens up to his woman about his past and issues, she will make it about herself and cry". This story is upsetting to hear, ok, but is not about you and you should leave it to them.
You met and fell in love with a different version of him. Imagine if he finds out you did kinky stuff with your exes and leaves you because of it: everyone in this room, included me, will tell you that it is your past and is not his business. You cam leave him, no one is stopping you, but you won't make a good impression by doing it
And here's a fun fact for you: everyone has done strange or bad things in their past, especially as little children. And children have a much stronger connection with their sexuality than you might imagine |
tw: abortion, mention of death
By all means go ahead and downvote this to hell.
I know myself well, and if I were unable to get an abortion, I'd throw myself down the stairs, do anything to miscarry.
Force me to carry to term and I'd 100% abandon the kid. I'd dump the baby on the father and leave them. I'll pay child support but have otherwise zero involvement with them. Heartless, but honest.
I'd rather die than become a mom.
I choose no.
I am why reproduction needs to be a choice. | I’m a parent and I work with kids. And I’m of the wholehearted belief that parents who don’t want kids…should in fact be able to choose not to be a parent. The alternative really is shitty for everyone. |
The worst part is that honestly it was all a blur before this morning.
Basically this morning, I was watching the news with my parents. And low and be behold a news story about a couple of hours from where I live, showed the same guy who physically abused and sexually assaulted me when I was nine being dragged out in handcuffs. The link to the fox News page is right here as well as some others 👇
[The Fox News Link For This DICKBAG](https://fox56.com/news/local/police-wayne-county-man-arrested-for-child-porn-and-pets-in-deplorable-conditions)
[here's another link to the story with some more info](https://www.cantonrep.com/article/20150211/news/150219851)
Not to mention that he wasn't only filed for childporn charges, he also was illegally housing at least 21 dogs in the home in EXTREMELY deplorable conditions. One of them even had to be put down down because they could barely walk. Some suggest it was illegal breeding but I'm pretty sure that he just let the dogs screw eachother without a care in the world.
This fucker. No. THIS ASSHOLE THREATENED TO PUT ME DOWN IF I EVER TOLD ANYONE. not to mention that he was in a relationship with my older sister at the time the assault took place. Yet I remained silent about all of this..
The worst part about all of this is that he's right now on bail for $25,000 dollars.
I've kept this bottled up for so long that I've become numb to it at this point. It wasn't until this morning that I finally let it all out. I cried so hard to the point where I could barely speak a coherent sentence. After all those years of hurting, neglecting to tell my parents, my family and friends, for them to find out about this after all these years through the God damn news. I'm honestly ashamed that I didn't tell them. But I didn't want to Inevitably be hurt by him. Or worse.
That's all I can possibly vent about right now. Thank you for reading about this I'll update if needed.. | GOOD. Fuck that guy!! I'm so sorry that happened to you and I'm SO sorry it took so long for him to get arrested.
But Fuck yes! About damn time! |
I'm being incredibly moody. I have one of the worst ear infections of my entire life so I'm just laying in bed and sobbing my eyes out
And to make me cry even more I keep thinking about stupid shit that makes me sad. And one thing that makes me sad is the fact that I loved someone with everything I could.. and they took advantage of that. People can be fucking awful and it's getting a bit harder to see the good.. I'm still doing my best to remember that there's good people out there. But God damn.. | I've also been in that situation. It's definitely not ideal. *Hugs* |
I was walking up some stairs at the train station and I ate shit (read: tripped over my own feet) and went flying, spilling shit everywhere. Someone had disposed of a circular saw blade (like wtf) on the stairs and im not sure if that's what I landed on but I cut my hand pretty fucking hard in several places and I was bleeding everywhere. I'm a bleeder, blood was running down my hand. So now I'm bloody and panicking about tetanus and I still have like, idk, 40 minutes to go in my commute.
But oh! I went to the college a few blocks away a few years back and I remember there's a police precinct like, idk, a block away. So I hobble, covered in mud and blood to the precinct and ring the buzzer. Someone finally answers after a few agonizing minutes and I say "hey I don't live around here but I tripped and fell and I'm bleeding quite badly, would you happen to have a first aid kit?" And this mother fucker says no. What kind of fucking police department doesn't have a first aid kit. So I'm like okay, fine, is it possible you have a sink I can wash my hand in because I fell on a bladed object I think and I just want to clean my wounds. And he again says no. They have a camera at the door so I'm literally holding up my bloody fucking hand. I'm not trying to break someone out of the drunk tank here I'm *bleeding*.
So I'm like, okay, again, I don't live around here is there *somewhere* I can clean up so I'm not bleeding all over public transit, and he says "idk there's a Tim Hortons at the train station like 3 blocks away". I feign ignorance. I know where the Tim Hortons is. It's the ONLY public bathroom between like 6 cities that hasn't been closed "due to covid" where the staff don't give a shit if you buy anything but it's like 6 blocks away. But I ask where it is anyway because I don't even fuckint know.
So I started crying because my hand fucking hurts like a bitch and I'm BLEEDING, and I hobble back like Gollum from whence I came when I remember there's a pub near the train station I was just at.
I walk in with dried tears on my face and said "excuse me i know you don't have public washrooms but i tripped and hurt my hand and was wondering if I could please just wash my hand so it will stop bleeding and I'll be on my way". And the very nice host pointed to the staff washroom where I very quickly washed my hands, wrapped them in a thick wad of paper towel (which I bled thru before I got home) and left. I bought a beer in the adjacent liquor store first to make up for it.
I got home an hour later and had my partner pull out the first aid kit and now I'm solidly wrapped in sterile gauze and medical tape.
Remember when you were a kid and your parents told you if you need help, you can always trust the police?
Fuck you New Westminster police department :) | that feels illegal but it sadly probably isnt... |
Well... most of it anyway.
I just miss being a kid, not having to worry about my grades, my grandparents were still around...
I miss the days of coming home from school and watching The Simpsons whilst eating my dinner. I miss going to stay round my grandparents' house every Summer and going to the beach.
I even miss the small things, like waking up on a Saturday morning then playing Club penguin, The Sims 2, Roblox and MovieStarPlanet on the shitty family PC.
Call me sensitive or a snowflake all you want but I feel like people were so much kinder back then? I'm not referring to how a lot of jokes are considered offensive now, I mean socially.
Lol, can you tell I'm bad at letting go of the past? | I feel the same way about the 90s. Everyone was nicer and things were so much simpler, there was so much optimism, pre-9/11. I know my dad feels the same about the 1950s. I think it's one of those universal truths about growing up. Doesn't make it fun, just know you're not alone in your feelings. |
It's nice to live in a world that encourages alliance between people based on similar experiences, but if someone drains the life out of you with their continuous flux of nebulous horse shit, take a step back and reconsider.
I'm serious. I come from a background of being raised to be "tough", in a culture that has had gender equality throughout the 20th century, and I find this mindset of othering and treating "traditional" femininity as archaic to be decrepit and tiring.
My glittery ass is on hands and knees trying to appease people who think I should stay ugly and exude masculine energy to be respected as an intelligent woman.
It's old and I used to be a tomboy, that's where my sense of humor comes from, but I'm bored of being kept on a leash because someone's insecure about themselves. Oh, you're quirky and not like other girls, congrats have a biscuit, treat yourself, idfc. | Agreed. There’s a considerable number of feminists who think everyone should agree with whatever they say—no matter how absurd and offensive it is—simply because they’ve disclaimed their feminist views. Anyone who disagrees with anything they say is either a misogynist or a spineless woman who loves the patriarchy. I won’t generalize but many of these women I’ve interacted with are mentally unstable with an insatiable need for attention; have very low self esteem and inflated ego; generalize that all men are worthless POS based on a single or few bad romantic or paternal experience; or are just downright terrible people. Ironically, these same women who claim to be self-sufficient are the same ones on SugarDaddy.com or getting pummeled across Tinder since 2012. |
My mother when she was younger was ALWAYS very slim and beautiful and could pass as a model and was very confident (cocky and arrogant imo) and went on dates all the time and clubbing etc. Both my sisters again are like models very pretty faces, slim, go out clubbing, get attention from men all the time, dress up. But me I’m the ugly one who drags everyone down. I’m very awkward and don’t go out very often, I’m chubby and hate my body so dress in baggier outfits and I’m very shy and quiet. Since I was 12 my mum always told me I need a nose job bc my nose is too big and ugly, and I need my ears pinned back bc they stick out too much and that I need to lose weight and be slim like my sisters. Every time I see them I get criticised for the way I dress and the way I look and they never invite me anywhere I’m Literally the family outcast and they’re ashamed of me. It makes me feel so shit in myself and reduces my already shitty confused I don’t feel like I belong in my family.
Edit: thank you so much for all of your support and messages in the comments it really means a lot! Xx | Counter their looks with your ambition.
I’m also the weird sibling but im the most educated and the breadwinner.
I have no interest in being the most attractive because that’s not where my gifts are.
Find your strengths and be the best at it. Even if their opinion of you doesn’t change, there opinions will not even matter. |
It's rude and disrespectful. These posts I see everywhere lately saying "Haha! You believed me when I said I'm there in 5min, see you in two hours friend" are bullshit. Where in the world is it acceptable to let a friend wait two hours for you on purpose? I could've chilled and watched netflix for longer too but no, I'm at the meeting point, because I respect that my friend takes time out of their day for me. The fact that adults who should have their shit together can't understand this simple concept annoys me to no end. | This was one of the reasons I don't think my ex and I should've worked longterm. She was constantly late to us hanging out, and it really bothered me. What kills me the most is when you know your friend lives 30 minutes away from your meeting point, and they text you "heading out now!" with 5 minutes to go. Like, you had to have known you were going to be late 25 minutes ago when you weren't walking out the door *then*. So text me as soon as you know, so that I can get there late too, that's all I'm asking.
It's one of my biggest pet peeves when people don't respect my time. |
I’m (20F) black and for spring break me and two friends (both 20F and white) are going down to Louisiana to visit Alexandria and New Orleans. The friend who suggested the idea said we were staying at her family house in Alexandria but in the countryside. When we get there it’s fine and the people at the diner we went to were super nice, but I then found out it was a sundown town and the first black person didn’t move there until 1990 and it’s still a 99% white town. It’s also still like 15 miles out from Alexandria.
We go to a PWI so I’m not unused to majority white spaces and she did warn me that her family was kind of racist but that we would be going out the way to avoid them. However, she also knows that I purposely avoid towns with exceptionally racial history, to the point that I have avoided a whole county in Georgia for this express purpose.
I understand she may not have known and it may not be something she thinks about but now I’m really uncomfortable (not with the current state of the town but the fact that even 30 years ago I wouldn’t have been able to step foot in the town) and I feel like I’ve been very accommodating to her needs (unmediated ADHD and autism) but she doesn’t even keep in mind the one nonnegotiable I have. | She might not even know what a sundown town is. Most people don’t lol |
Besides the obvious reason that most men are can’t see a shirtless women without sexualizing her why else are women not allowed to go shirtless it’s the stupidest thing ever the biggest double standard and I literally get so mad thinking about it this really is a man’s world and everyone else just has to deal with it women can’t even breastfeed with it being sexualized and making men uncomfortable it’s stupid asf | It's legal in NYS. Anywhere men can be topless, women can be topless too. I got arrested for it once. Charges were dropped. Could have sued, will sue if they ever bother me about that shit again. |
News flash! It's 2022 and women work too, so your "i work all day" line doesn't cut it.
I'm studying in college to goto university and last week I was rammed with assignments so I wasn't doing any housework or cooking (i made him aware of this), because my schoolwork required all my focus. Did we eat hot homecooked meals? No, because he cba to cook anything. Was the house clean? Not until Sunday when I literally had to tell him to do it because now I was working my job which is 12 hour shifts.
Why is he also incapable of folding towels to be put back on the radiators? Why can he never remember to turn off the electric for the shower after he's showered? Or even put his toiletries away after showering, of which he only does once a week, and don't even get me started on the lack of brushing his teeth.
If I knew he was going to live like a slob then I would never have bought this house with him. I'm supposed to be his partner not his fucking mother.
He quite literally gets up, goes to work without washing or brushing his teeth, then comes home, maybe walks the dog if I haven't done it and then plays xbox all night and leaves fucking sweet wrappers on the lounge floor.
I'm so unhappy, but I feel stuck in this relationship. | Because they don't face consequences for it. Be the consequence.
Edit: Loving the men taking it personally and throwing a tantrum here because someone said their boyfriend doesn't pick up his slack and I told them to stop being quiet about it. Keep it coming. |
**Please, do not tell me what to eat or how to exercise. I exercise every day, I do eat better than literally everyone I know, I had my thyroid checked.** My body just stores fat excessively whenever I am stressed.
Which is great, because I am stressed about my weight. During writing my thesis I gained yet again more than 20 pounds. I stopped scaling myself, as it just resulted in a breakdown every single morning. I do not fit in my old clothes, I have to order new ones online as stores do not have my size anymore. I need to go to the doctors, but I will not go because they will not even try to solve my problem, they will tell me to stop drinking sweet drinks or some other BS instead of helping me (Before you get triggered, last time I drank something that wasn't water or black coffee was three months ago. Before that probably early summer.).
I feel sorry for my BF to be seen in public with such a whale. I decline his invitations to have dinner dates, because I do not want to be seen eating in public. I was never thin, so I am used to the constant discrimination and looks but this hit a new level. I haven't talked to most of my friends for about half a year because of this.
I did try to go to an obesitologist, I was told to ef off and try when there is no Covid anymore. I am out of options and I see no solution available.
Edit: Spelling, not a native speaker, sorry.
Second Edit: Appears that I should make the first sentence bold.
Third Edit: Thank you to everyone who showed some support and didn't accuse me of lying. I really appreciate your kindness <3. This has been a wild experience; I have never seen so much false information in a single thread, and I mean there is QAnon and antivaxers. No wonder so many people struggle with weight loss when most of the society goes around screaming that sacharids are pure evil, rice contains a lot of fat, cortisol influencing fat metabolism is a medical anomaly and that everyone's metabolisms are the same. If you think any of those, please, stop giving people 'advice'. Or just generally stop giving people medical advice, you are not a doctor nor a chemist. | Don’t take this as me trying to be rude or something, but I feel I need to point this out.
You said in your post that you exercise and diet properly, or at the very least try to, but you’re not getting results. So, why not try something different? There’s more than one proper diet, more than one set of exercises that achieve the goal you want, and other options are out there if you research some. I’m not a dietician or expert in any of this at all, but I do know that if you keep trying to achieve a goal and what you’re doing isn’t working, you eventually have to stop looking and the problem and realize your current attempt at a solution is lacking somewhere.
It’s obvious you’re annoyed at the situation, and have a shit ton of people say, “You should eat better and exercise more” and I totally get that. In no mean should you not be annoyed by a problem you’re struggling to solve. I also understand you have a medical condition hurting your ability to fix it as well. Eventually though you’re going to have to make a choice to accept it even though you’re currently unhappy, or you’ll have to try something new. The faster you get started on trying new things for this, the fast you’ll eliminate solutions that don’t work for you.
Finally, if your BF hasn’t voiced concerns to you, it’s best you don’t assume his mindset over this for him. Regardless of how hard you try not to you’re going to wind up projecting that mindset on to him, and that will kill a relationship faster than anything.
Best of luck. I really do hope you find what works for you. Try new things, but stay humble enough to see it when you’re wrong, and you’ll certainly find something that works for you. |
I swear I see the same argument over and over again about why a woman would have an OF. But no one seems to question male porn stars or men with OF
Why is it that men are allowed to do whatever they want with their bodies but god forbid a woman do the EXACT same thing and suddenly all hell breaks loose. It’s ridiculous.
I have not seen a single person question why a man would be a porn star or an escort or anything along those lines. But if it’s a woman people have all types of reasons as to why a woman would POSSIBLY be a sex worker. | I dont know where you live but in my country, a male prostitute has to change his name and face if he wants to have any shred of normal life after retirement. |
My mom (adoptive) has multiple mental disorders and health issues, so she takes a lot of medication. I was adopted at birth, and it’s been this way since I was brought home. If she forgets to take one or accidentally takes too many, she’s absolutely out of it. My first memory of her was her taking me to get a Halloween costume, but she was in her “out of it” state. Driving incredibly dangerously, stole a Halloween decoration from a store, and ended up 4 hours from home. I wasn’t even old enough to remember our phone number, so it took a while to get in touch with my dad (adoptive). The police were involved, she had to ride in the backseat in handcuffs and to this day I don’t know if she was arrested for anything or not. I know it’s standard to handcuff the person in the backseat even if you’re just transporting them. She was in the hospital for a week or two after that.
I have always had a roof over my head, food, and I got most things I would ask for. But neither of my parents were ever there for me emotionally, and every time I would come to them with something it ended badly. The house was constantly filled with yelling and slamming doors, and still is now. None of my childhood memories involve them unless it was something bad. Of course I know there were good moments then, but I can only remember the bad ones. I attempted suicide multiple times at 10-11, and after one of them my mom said to me “you know you’re going to hell, right?” It’s been ingrained in my head ever since, and of course she denies saying it, just like she denies every hurtful thing she’s ever said or done.
When my cousin was staying at the house, my mom told me she preferred my cousin over me. When I was raped in this house and my mom blamed my cousin for not protecting me (I don’t think that was her obligation, but that’s how my mom felt), guess who stayed in the house for another 3 months and got even closer to my mom? My cousin got even heavier into her alcoholism and it was a constant reminder of what happened. I had to repeatedly beg my mom to have her move out, and I was repeatedly told it was my fault for getting drunk.
My mom doesn’t apologize for the sake of anyone but herself. I cannot tell you how many times she’s said or done something extremely fucked up, then came banging on my door for me to open it. If I open it, “I’m so sorry, I love you.” If I don’t forgive her? “Fine then” as she walks away slamming the door behind her. If you were genuinely sorry you would understand why the person isn’t forgiving you. If I don’t open it, which is the case as I’m writing this, “please open the door” in a pleading voice. Immediately switching to “open this fucking door right now” while banging on it. She expects me to want to talk to her after she screams at me and kicks the door repeatedly. “Dad will deal with you when he gets home.”
(In depth explanation as to why I’m currently locked in a room below)
All of this specific issue is because after my therapy appointment (which she doesn’t seem to enjoy me going to as she probably knows I’m mostly talking about her) she wanted to go into a walk-in clinic for a bump she has already had checked out. I asked her to drop me off at home first as I knew it would take a long time. Nope, you’re coming with me. So I sat in the car for over 2.5 hours. She lost a bracelet while in there, came out yelling for me to call the therapist to see if it was there. Bad service, so yells at me some more because of course it’s my fault.
Once she was done and got into the car, she told me it was a cyst that they had drained. Okay, cool. Not even two minutes later, she lowers the volume to look at me through her rear-view mirror (I had moved to the backseat to lay down while waiting for her) and says “nobody cares about me, I thought you would ask how it went in there.” I said “I had waited almost 3 hours for you, and you already told me how it went when you got into the car.” Cue screaming that it was not even close to three hours. Meanwhile my appointment ended at 2pm, takes 10 minutes to get to the clinic, and she got back into the car at a quarter until 5.
We get home, walk through the garage, and she slams the door in my face before I can walk in. I open the door, say “really?” at a volume I thought she couldn’t hear, and am met with “what did you say?” I don’t respond because I’m tired of hearing her yell. “You’re just not going to speak?” I went outside to take the dog out and thankfully got some smiles in. Come upstairs to hear her talking on the phone, telling someone I’m mean, that I probably wish that she were dead, and that I’m never going to do anything. Turns out she was talking to my cousin which sent me absolutely over the edge. I opened the door and sarcastically asked “who ya talkin’ to?” while already crying. Looking back this was just petty and I regret doing it. I just wanted her to know I had heard and I was upset. Again, that was petty. “Is it any of your fucking business?” I walked into a different room and locked the door because I don’t see the point in talking to someone who talks that way about their daughter.
I know that I get easily agitated with my mom, even when she’s being nice. Though, her being “nice” involves snide remarks and insults. It’s just incredibly difficult to forgive the things she’s done. She jokes about things that have seriously hurt me. Like me getting out of the shower to smell smoke, only to call to her downstairs and not get a response. Run downstairs, she’s unresponsive sitting on the couch because she took too much medication. I had to slap her leg multiple times for her to even open her eyes. I genuinely thought she was dead, and then I had to deal with the burning food, mess, and getting all of the smoke out of the house. When I told her about it the next day, I was met with “you probably wish I was dead”, which is exactly what she told my cousin over the phone today.
I want to leave so badly. I do love my mom but she hurts me so much. I have debilitating anxiety and cannot hold a job or even school. I basically dropped out in 8th grade. I have MDD and zero motivation. I was on medication since I was 11 and only stopped when I was almost 17 because all I felt was numbness. I’m nearly 18 now and I can feel myself slipping into my lowest points again. I want to get better, and I want to have my life sorted. I’ve just been isolated for so long. I only have two close friends and they’re both online. Only two in person friends from 11-15. I dropped them because they were stealing from me and my parents. I thought it’d be better having no friends than having bad friends. I don’t know if that’s still true. Every day is a struggle and I don’t even fucking do anything. | I'm so sorry. Fuck, you shouldn't have had to deal with this shit. I'm sorry. |
There’s literally no difference. I’m entertaining myself while you’re entertaining yourself. Some times I can look up. With my eyes. And watch whatever the fuck you got on your screen. Some times I’ll hand you my phone to show you my screen. My entire existence isn’t to watch you play video games or whatever you want to watch. I’ll do whatever I want whenever I want. “We *were* hanging out but gf is on her phone the whole time.” No. We weren’t hanging out. You were in game chat with your friends for two hours and didn’t hear a word I said because of your head set so I got on my phone for a bit. Literally just shut the fuck up.
ETA: obviously it’s different if they already agreed to watch something with you. I’m talking about when you live with someone and you’re just both hanging out in the living room or something. Like, I’m allowed to entertain myself | My dad does that ALL the time. He'll sit there and watch basketball and require me and my siblings to all be in the room with him and watch. I do not like basketball. My brother does not like basketball. My sister does not like basketball. But we wants our full attention on the screen at all times, even commercials. Insane |
So not to long ago I found my girlfriend emotionally cheating on me, she was basically holding a relationship with 2 other men for a month and I caught her with both at 2 separate times in that one month. They had been going on for 2 months amidst my girlfriends cold demeanor and strange behavior.
I TOLD her I looked through her phone, which in our past 10 years I never felt the need to do, and she pretty much was like okay yeah I figure but then changed her password and locked me out of it.
Now she just tells me that the whole situation is crazy and that I’m being unhealthy and that it’s only gonna make it worse for myself.
I spend all of my waking minutes thinking about this shit and I can’t stop instigating fights and asking to see her phone. I’m not s monster I WONT harm and can’t FORCE her but it tears me apart that she REFUSES to show me anything as I think it’s more of a peace of mind for me. I know it’ll only give me that peace for a short moment but she can’t even do that. I’m just supposed to sit here and sulk in it if I want to work things out.
I wanna stay with her so bad but I also wanna leave so bad. | She got you controlled, you depend on her emotionally way too much, get your act together and leave, she is gonna leave you anyway, she is planning to make like she is the victim to not feel guilty, do the right thing and leave now. Dont let her control you,Dont say i didnt warn you 🤷🏼♂️ |
Cannot watch anything that is rated as " adult " with there being random sex scene even if it isn't graphic rough fucking pornhub type scenes it pisses me off so much man I just wanna watch stuff with swearing, gore and voilence without unneedee sex scenes ffs. Cannot watch any R rated movie without someone fucking 6 min before the final scene stupid shit | Like yeah, Hollywood executives think being an adult is all about sex, when in reality it is more about paying the bills |
My boss was all excited to come into work and plan a "Pilgrims and Indians" day where she would as she put it, "wear a cute little Indian girl outfit, with moccasin boots and Indian headpiece" (shes like 70), and wanted me and coworkers to dress up too. I spoke to the 2nd in command under this boss, and told her that was wildly inappropriate and no way I would do it. The boss held a short meeting with staff saying "I heard there was an issue with dressing up for Indians and Pilgrims day, people are so sensitive these days, its fun and cute to remember a great thing".
Then she directed the topic on me and only me, inquiring what was so wrong about Thanksgiving and her event, with a massive smile on her face, my coworkers awkwardly trying to avoid the topic/eye contact.I told her the pilgrims gave the NATIVE AMERICANS smallpox killing them, it was genocide, and people got forced off their homes, today Native Americans still don't have proper human rights and their culture is rapidly diminishing as it always has and it would be insensitive to wear cheap costumes to mimic them, and not something I would ever downplay so I wouldn't participate. She threw a fit like a child, calling my generation sensitive and overly soft, as she got upset about not getting to dress like a "cute little Indian girl" (wtf). She shuffled her papers and walk away all mad saying she didn't want to stir the pot.............
It was so awkward. Coworkers I spoke to about it just yesterday who said they felt the same were SILENT during this interrogation but I held my own. Weird way to just confirm my boss is an out-of-touch racist boomer who thinks shes still 20yrs old... | My great grandparents lost friends and family as children at the residential schools. Murdered and buried in mass graves- all children. Thanks for having common sense and sticking up for them. |
She wants a pink drink. I get her a pink drink. She gets mad saying she wanted a blue drink. So I get her a blue drink. She gets mad and says she wanted pink. I get her pink. She gets mad asking why did I get her a drink. So I don't give her a drink. The she gets mad that I didn't get her a drink. I ask her what drink does she want and she refuses to tell me and throw a fucking tantrum.
WHAT DO I DO? SHE REFUSES TO SAY SHIT AND EVERYTHING I DO ITS NEVER ENOUGH.
This morning she wanted clothes. I offer pants and she said no pants. She wanted shorts. She said no to every pair of shorts we have. She got mad AT ME FOR NOT SOMEHOW BEING ABLE TO SUMMON THE SHORTS SHE WANTS. She said no to every shirt we have. Then gets mad at me. HOW WHEN SHE KEEPS TELLING ME "NONONONONO" TO EVERYTHING WE HAVE? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
I can fucking drain myself of blood for her and she will only bitch. That's all she knows what to do. She's never fucking happy with anything I do do or happy with what she has.
And I'm supposed to somehow control time and space to give her everything she wants that very second or she throws a fucking tantrum like a fucking toddler.
I fucking hate her why am I stuck with her as a mother
And before I get "jUsT mOvE oUt" I fucking can't. I tried. It's too fucking expensive even at the cheapest place. I have no family or friends to help me. I'm just going to be forever stuck with a forever ungrateful bitch. I fucking gave up my highschool years to take care of this bitch and she thanks me by complaining about everything?
She wants a TV show. I read them out. She GETS MAD AT ME FOR NOT FINDING SOMETHING. BUT KEEPS SAYING NO TO EVERY FUCKING THING THEY HAVE.
I hate her. Never fucking happy with anything. I don't even know why I bother to be here if I'm stuck with this living cancer forever.
Editing due to this getting a tiny bit of attention:
Yes, she is my mother. No, I can't just leave her like I have been wanting to. She's disabled, blind, can't really walk too well, and no one else to take care of her. This account is really just for me to vent and bitch because I don't like the idea of selling my organs for counseling or keep getting rejected for insurance, let alone add any more work than I already do.
I know my situation isn't the best but where I'm at, there are no resources and even then, word spreads too fast for my comfort over here. We literally got off a phone call with someone else and within a day everyone else knew what the call was about so I'm not exactly comfortable with looking for resources here.
I am looking into ways of somehow getting more funds. I'm just having untreated caregiver burnout and a lot of emotions coming in due to it being extremely delayed. And the thought of having to do more, I just don't think I have enough mental energy for that yet.
I jotted this down because I was very mad at the moment and still kinda am. I can't even go outside to calm down without her getting mad so yeah.
And I know all I ever show on my venting is the bad side of her, but it just feels too complicated than simply up and go because I have a younger brother to think about, as well as how I will exactly live out on my own.
It's just a lot and I really don't want to think about it let alone deal with it. | I read the first half of this and thought "surely he's talking about a toddler and this just a tongue-in-cheek rant". Your mother sounds like she needs a nursing home where people get paid to deal with her. |
I want to take my hijab off. I wore it (“by choice”) when i was 11 and didnt know the true dedication it needed. I tried taking it off at 18, but my parents lost their minds. My mom collapsed crying on the floor and my dad rushed home early from work to talk some sense into me. I locked myself in my room and had to text my mom i wanted to take it off, because i was so afraid. I kept it locked while her and my dad begged me to open. When i opened, it was just my mom hysterically crying and mumbling nonsense. My dad was obv pissed asf and kept blaming my mom for it, since hes at work everyday till 8 pm so it “isnt his fault”. She even accepted the blame. They begged and begged and i stood my ground for hours. However, later on my mom was in her bed not moving and just muttering religious nonsense. Like, she was seeing god talk to her. My dad had to take me aside and ask me to change my mind because my mom isnt doing too well. I ended up saying id keep it on for them. My mom made me swear with my hand on the quraan days later to never bring up taking it off ever again.
I dont understand why what i choose to do with my body left my mom with high fever and chills for about a week.
I dont understand why we women are so fucked in our lives, the world is completely against us and it feels like a curse living in my body
I just want to feel happy. I just want to be myself and live freely. Im so tired of feeling so ugly everyday. I do not like the hijab on me. I have long beautiful curly hair that i cry about having to hide
No outfits i like are ever wearable as a hijabi
I look 15 in it, im almost 22.
People automatically assume im boring and have no personality/ i dont speak english
Im not confident in my hijab
I have been verbally harassed countless times over it
Im tired of feeling so unsafe everyday wearing it
But i care so much about my parents, that id rather suffer than them suffer.
I just cant wait to die | Traditional parents are always cringe |
Spending my 22nd birthday alone today. My parents are both dead, and my Dad died 5 years ago this week... Fuck this. My aunt and her family blew me off and didn't show up to the dinner we planned last week. Practically the only people who have wished me a happy birthday are my coworkers. How the fuck did I end up so alone? What the fuck am I doing here? Now more than ever I want to move away somewhere and cut contact with everyone. Apparently they wouldn't give a fuck anyway. Does this shit ever get better?
Edit: thank you to everyone for the birthday wishes!! This beyond made my day. It really means a lot to me that each of you stopped and took the time to wish me a good day or drop some advice. I'm eternally grateful and ended up enjoying myself! Went on a picnic and now I'm ordering dinner out :) Looking forward to making some big changes this year... Here's to 22!
Edit 2: lmao I feel like I'm getting my birthday card signed by everyone in the office, but it's just r/vent. You guys are fantastic... Thank you 💓 | Happy birthday!
So, I qw t thru a nasty divorce + bad rebound relationship for about 10+ years
. After the dust settled I found myself alone, outcast by the friends, working all the time and never seeing my kids.
So I decided one day after hitting a depressing lonely rock. Bottom to just leave.
I had never been out of my area really, definitely not to live. But took a plunge and decided to go for it.
And we'll, who've to some lame new place, I decided to go on a real adventure to find myself at 29 years old.
Grand canyon was my choice.
Found a job for seasonal work, with housing included.
Perfect, no stress of long term work mentality, met new people saw new things...
So I kept going, Florida, NC, Colorado, California, Texas, Wyoming, Arizona
I found that for me doing seasonal jobs with housing allowed me to explore, makeover, see amazing places and meet awesome new people.
I still return back home for timw.with family and kids , im.never gone too long...
That's how I've made friends after 30.
I'm a whitewater raft guide now, and heading to beach to blow glass this winter.
I regret nothing. There's a big world out there, you gotta go get it, it rarely comes to you.
Now eat some cake get drunk and remember your awesome! |
This will be the second time in a row that the US Presidential election will be a choice of two very bad options. Hillary vs Trump was corrupt-self-serving-entitled-incompetent vs inexperienced-narcissist-school-yard bully. This coming election is going to be immature-spoiled-dictator vs. visionless-bumbling-clueless-puppet. WTF!!!!
I genuinely believe the reason we don't get truly competent candidates is because the good ones look at the process to get elected and say it's not worth having the press tear into every minuscule aspect of their lives and have it dissected and overblown.
Every good person has skeletons in their closet. Americans need to learn to look beyond the tabloid material of candidates' live and instead look at their competence, their positions, their policies. | One suggestion from a Canadian. Drop the 2 party system. We have a multi party system here. Last election there were 6 candidates for PM. |
I’m from another country and the work is outsourced to us by a huge American corporation.
The customers are horrendous to deal with most of the time. Are most Americans usually dumb, entitled, demanding, selfish, obnoxious, rude, and being assholes like this? How can you live in a country full of people like that? Jesus, I feel blessed that I live in my own country, not as economically developed as America but surely more civilized.
Dealing with this kind of population does take a toll on my mental health. I think I am severely underpaid for this job. | As someone who has worked in customer service, too, people can be all those things and worse, but bear in mind that people who are calling customer support are, by default, already having a bad day, and it can be frustrating for paying customers to deal with the wall of corporate bureaucracy that prevents them from getting to where they need to go.
It's not your fault, and you deserve to be treated better, and this doesn't excuse their abuse towards you either. |
Yesterday a 16 year old got shot 4 times outside of his home in my area due to gang war. I was at my computer in my apartment and my girlfriend was on the other side of the neighbourhood with her friend (the same side where the boy got shot), I heard 4 loud bangs but assumed it was hammering sounds.
But the bangs came from the same area as my girlfriend was currently in so just to be sure I called her and went to the kitchen window to look outside. That's when I saw people running and hiding and I instantly knew what had happened.
Luckily she answered but had no idea what just happened (I assume she also thought of it as hammering sounds). I told her and her friend to get to safety and be careful. I instantly ran outside over to the other side of the neighbourhood towards my girlfriend. That's when we saw the boy who got shot. I assume it was his mom who was crying on top of him on the ground.
Apparently my gf and her friend saw two mysterious cars right before the shooting stop and talk to eachother. And also right after the shooting a guy with a hoodie on, ran right past them with something in his pockets (pretty sure it was a gun).
We stayed in the area a few meters away from the boy since we wanted to give people some space. And we waited until police came so we could tell everything we heard/saw.
The thought of the poor boy and his mom. The thought that my gf and her friend could have been in danger. I also wish I could have done more to help, maybe if I could have done something the boy would have survived. I'm just so tired of all the violence here in the city. Literally the same day that the boy got shot a fire bomb was planted outside of my friends work place.
The gang war needs to be stopped, I just wished there was a easier way to stop it. | More needs to be done to stop gang violence. It's killing our youths and our future. |
I went to a bar to dance tonight
Cute guy... Wants to come home with me
I override my urges and say no!!
Wtf
Like I'm dying for sex
But I said no
Happy sad proud moment | And I'm drunk so like that's amazing right? |
I can tell when I stink and I get self conscious. Can some people not tell or do they not care?? Especially if it’s so strong I can smell you from across the workplace. I don’t wanna be a jerk but I wish there was a polite way to confront somebody that their odor is strong every single day and they need to take better care of their smell in a shared workplace. This person has well kept hair and makeup but they SMELL SO BAD like it’s not like she just rolled out of bed she clearly got ready but she STINKS UP OUR WHOLE WORKPLACE how can she not smell it! When I pass her in the hall I have to hold my breath it’s so strong and rank | OP it might be uncontrollable like others mentioned; the fact that she's able to portray herself so neatly & well-groomed yet stinks; it could be a chronic metabolic/hormonal/digestive issue that's harder to control than you think. Speaking from personal experience as I've had chronic bo since puberty that no amount of hygiene helped. I know its frustrating dealing with such invasive smells, but I hope you can spare this possibility and offer her some empathy |
I am a very friendly girl. I say hi to everyone at school, I offer to help people with things. I however have no friends. Someone I spoke to about it said that I'm excluded because I am a POC, lesbian,and I have ADHD. others have put me down for contributing to lessons 'too much.'
I love wearing colourful make-up and accessories, but I am made fun of for that, too.
It seriously needs to stop.
It got so overwhelming last year that I had thoughts of ending my life. My anxiety has changed who I am. All because I'm 'different' | You beautiful souls are breaking my heart. I am 49F and was always "too much". Don't dim your shine for anyone. It does get easier. I found my people a little later in life, however I am so glad I pushed on. Life is already hard and if you are happy with yourself it makes it a lot easier. Much love my beautiful butterflies. ❤ |
I was having a bad day at work and my coworker gave me a hug and it made me feel so good. I was crying and he was like "do you need a hug?" and hugged me. He was so nice. I really needed that hug | ʕっ•ᴥ•ʔっ |
You think you have found a group that understands what it is like to be lgbt, and sure they do. But they are also full of the most toxic, cliquey and powerhungry people imagineable. The regulars of these lgbt groups will actively avoid talking to you, the mods are so far up their own asses they think themselves above the common user and the formations of the "close friends" with the mods forms this very "VIP" Experience for them, and only them.
It's like high school except the people in charge are "sassy" and "bitchy, but not in a rude way" and also GROWN ASS ADULTS.
They advertise as being a welcome environment, but I joined these discords about a month ago and each one of them are actively against newcomers. They keep the discords open for the numbers and then it's like a private forum for the same regulars. they dont involve the newcomers in conversations, and it makes you wonder why they don't just have their own private discords. And then you talk to other newcomers in private and find that they have the same experience.
In conclusion, avoid LGBT discords if you can. Find specific discords that match your interests because you will find no friendships in these unless you are already friends with the VIP clique. | I got banned immediately from the official LGBT discord or whatever for saying my name was Hugo |
Hi,
I don’t know where else to tell this story to. Tonight I went to a restaurant event, where they play live music on the beach and serve drinks and serve drinks and such.
After the live music was done, we all start filing out and figuring out rides home and Ubers. I heard what I thought was fireworks (mind you I live in a beach town where not a lot goes on) so I turn to be like “haha just fireworks” but it was a little too loud and too erratic.
It was a man with a gun. He missed the first few round but shot a man in the abdomen multiple times. I was just to the side of the victim of the shooting which I feel guilty about because I am so priveledged and lucky to be alive.
He called his wife to tell her that he was bleeding out and probably not going to come home to her or his children. Thank god I was with friends who were paramedics and did what they could. I gave a police statement and I don’t know how to live normally rn. I’m watching Bluey and writing this but I am so numb. | Breathe mate just take a moment and breathe be present if you have family near by call them or go to them if it is save. Also you can call a support line at all times but right now it it important that you talk to someone about it don’t go and sit alone in your room with your thoughts. |
I was sexually assaulted by my friend when I was 8. She tried to put her fingers up me. I'm 13 now. I've been going to therapy but I'm still terrified I'll see her again somehow. Actually, I just had a dream about her a couple days ago. I was panicking when I woke up, and went into a venting discord server (not the best place I know but I was freaking out) and I told them everything that happend. That I was sexually assaulted, that she tried sticking her hands up me, but she was only able to touch me. They then went on to tell me "it was sexual assault not rape. It's not as bad" and it fucking broke me. People always use excuses to not listen to sexual trauma whether it's "oh you're both girls so it doesn't count" or "it was just a dumb kid mistake." And I'm fucking tired of it | It's the trauma that sticks with you that's heavy ..
people shouldn't compare them, sexual assault and rape.
How it leaves the victim is always different. Especially the healing process. It takes a lot of time to fully recover.
Abuse is abuse. |
I hate you. I care about you and in some way I still love you but I FUCKING HATE YOU. I gave you my time and my effort. I changed myself for the better. I started to have better spending habits I started the career I wanted. I did it all and you just left me.no warning nothing not even a reason on why. If I am so perfect in your eyes then why leave. I HATE YOU SO MUCH! You left me broken you hurt me when all I ever did was try and help you. I loved you I planned our future and you through it all away now every day I can hear your voice in my head like a reminder that your happy without me meanwhile I'm sad and feel broken inside. I hate you so much and I know it's not right to hate you and it hurts to hate you but I hate you! | I’m sorry that they left. Sorry won’t help but I’m still saying it. SO:
I’m sorry they left
I’m sorry you had to go through all that
I’m sorry you gave them your time
I’m sorry that they weren’t the one
I’m sorry they broke your heart
im sorry your crying right not (not sure)
I’m sorry that theses sorry’s aren‘t helping.
but what I’m not sorry about is:
I’m not sorry you loved her because that was love
i’m not sorry that you were happy with them
i’m not sorry that you cared for them
i’m not sorry that you have a better career
hope you’re doing ok,
-love
a stranger who cares❤️❤️❤️ |
I always put a lot of thought into everyone I’m “friends” with. I remember their birthdays, I remember the things they like; but when it’s my turn, nothing.
I don’t know what to do with myself, but I’ve been crying for almost two hours on and off.
Maybe I’m being dramatic, but no one said anything to me. Not a single family member or friend.
I feel useless. | Happy birthday!!!
I truly hope your day improves, I understand how you feel.
It’s a hard time to be alive
❤️ |
I am so guilt ridden right now I could puke….. my boyfriend (ex) beat me up for the last time tonight. I did it. I stood up for myself and he’s in the back of a squad car on his way to jail. 8 years we’ve been together I feel so terrible for sending him to jail that’s not what I wanted please help me I know I shouldn’t feel guilty 😭 he texted me and said whyyyyyy you ruined my life. | Why feel quilty? Now he has to take responsibility of his own actions. |
Let me start with I know that what a woman goes through in labor is incredibly hard and challenging on them both mentally and physically.
So my wife got induced Friday morning and things progressed fine all day. They gave her an epidural at 4PM Friday and things were good. Around midnight the baby’s heart rate dropped which caused my wife’s to drop..
We had every nurse on the floor in our room in seconds. They flipped her on hands and knees, woke the on-site surgeon and started prepping the OR and a crash team. They got her and the baby stabilized in about 15 min. So that was at midnight.
She labored through until it caused too much stress on her body so they sedated her and put her on oxygen for a few hours around 4 AM Saturday. She progressed to a little over 9cm.
Around 9:30AM Saturday she gradually stopped having contractions and essentially going backwards.
They ended having to doing an emergency c section at 11ish.
When the baby came out he wasn’t breathing and didn’t for the first 5 min. They had to resuscitate him all the while they had a hard time stopping my wife’s bleeding. So. Much. Blood…. It was all over.. The drs discovered some infection while they had her opened up and had to look for more infection which took them longer. I watched them pull my wife’s insides out asking for help with the bleeding and the NICU nurses flip my child’s lifeless body around to get him breathing.
So I bounced around the operating room between my wife and child checking on them for like 20 minutes being completely helpless.
Both baby and mama have gotten the all clear and are at home recovering. No immediate issues with either of them. I know it’s silly to be upset because we came home and are doing okay when so many people don’t get that opportunity. I just can’t get the OR out of my head. It’s playing over and over. Very vividly…
Let me close with… I firmly believe nurses are a GOD SEND and I plan on seeking professional help this week. Just needed to vent.
Edit: this was the last week of 2023 | It's not silly to be upset, this IS traumatic as hell. Can you see a therapist? I know CBT and EMDR have been immensely helpful for me |
When i was 8 (i am 19 now), my brother (16 at the time) started sexually assaulting me. He would touch my private areas while he would wank to me. At first being 8 years old i thought this is how people act. I was uncomfortable with it but moved on. On my 9th birthday, he raped me for the first time after sexually assaulting me for months, days on end. He took me under the trampoline in the back garden and I remember my parents catching him doing it and he got away with it. I never told anyone after that. He continued to touch me and rape me, he would do it whenever he got the chance. I remember when I was 11 I thought i was pregnant after he didn’t use protection, I wasn’t but I just remember how i would sit in the toilet sobbing begging my period to come so that i knew i wasn’t. It continued to happen up until i was 16. The last time it happened is the time i often get flashbacks about. he had just had his girlfriend over and it hadn’t happened since he got a girlfriend. He made me get in the car and promised he wouldn’t do anything and told be he would get us Mcdonald’s. My dumbass said yes, but obviously we didn’t go. no. he took me to a secluded area and raped me in his car and took me home. I remember scrubbing myself so many times to the point i was bleeding. I was sobbing in my bedroom and needed help. I couldn’t do anything nor could i tell anyone. My parents talk down on rape victims all the time saying the ask for it, nor do I get along with them, they hate that i’m autistic so i do not feel comfortable telling them. I am reaching out for support in uni because i still get flashbacks and it’s beginning to affect my uni experience, i’m incapable of intimacy and commitment because of him. I wish i could just forget and move on but my brother contacted me earlier saying he is coming to visit me soon. I am terrified. What do I do? I do not want to see him. I know what will happen. | I think you should report him to the police. Your family could turn their back on you. Don’t meet him, he’s evil. I’m so sorry what a horrible situation you had to experience. It’s not your fault. I really hope you can leave your family behind, and find joy and peace from life. You deserved so much more. I do think you should report him to the police and don’t tell him you will. Or your family. |
"Narcissistic"... "Gaslighting"....
Do you actually know what these things mean?
I thought the old meta on Reddit was annoying, with everyone self-diagnosing for some of that sweet sweet attention, but this new "everyone is a therapist" trend is far worse.
It was one thing when a 14 year old girl labelled herself with a complicated mental disorder that she clearly lacked the qualification to understand. Psychological issues, a need for validation and attention... I get it. I don't like it, but I get it.
This broad misuse of certain words by self proclaimed experts is as stupid as it is lazy. How dare you advise people on life issues when you *don't even understand the words you are using.* You are *NOT* helping anyone.
So heres a few little lessons:
"Narcissism" isn't just "thinking of themselves" - we have a word for that. Its *Selfishness*. Narcissism is a full on personality disorder that cant be diagnosed on "selfish behaviour". There is a full list of far more deeply complex behaviours. To make things worse, you seem to either not realise or have forgotten that Narcissism is an *affliction* that someone *suffers from*. If you don't understand that then STFU before casually tossing it around as an adjective.
"Gaslighting" is when you try to make someone believe something that is not true. This is *not* the same as vanilla *lying*. It involves directly contradicting something someone knows to be true until they doubt themselves and/or give in to your version of events.
It's a *form* of manipulation, but not *all* manipulation is "gaslighting".
Stop taking power away from these words. Some of us actually *need* these words to accurately describe people or situations. If you keep robbing them of their power then they don't get taken as seriously when it matters.
Next time you learn a new word, google it. It takes literally moments, and when armed with the *real* definition, you actually stand a chance of sounding like you know what you're talking about, and not like a complete tool. | Yes. Finally someone said it. Thank you for putting this out there. Amazingly worded. |
Me (20 F) and my brother (15 M) used to get a long so well when we was kids, he was mostly raised by me and my sister (16F currently) due to at the time my dad working long hours at a factory and my mom being relatively absent despite being SAHM, i started to notice changes in him when he got into secondary school (UK yr 7, 11 years old) . he would become aggressively defensive of the "boys are better than girls" rhetoric and come out with slightly homophobic stuff it didn't help that at the time my dad shared similar views and when he quit the factory job he and my dad would spend a lot of time together as my brother started football and my dad would take him.
he then started to insult me and my sister calling us fat, whales, cows, lezbos, queers ect even when we were not arguing he would use it to address us and just to be mean, even getting his friends to join in. i tried talking to him about this stuff but it goes nowhere . when i was working as a coach (i would coach in different areas) i had clients in 3 separate clubs come up to me and tell me that my brother had bullied them, ive had parents approach me and even kids coming up to me on the street telling me. he would bully these kids to the point of tears. the amount of arguments i had with him and my parents over this was astounding.
then he discovered the tatertot community (if you know then you know). he took this mentality in full swing, his homophobia has gotten worse to the point it makes you feel sick, he doesn't believe in equal rights for women of any kind, openly states that gay people should be killed, and that if he ever had gay kids he would disown or even beat them (knowing that I am bisexual), he thinks depression is a choice and people should just choose to be happy (knowing our aunt on my dads side has tried to commit unalive at least 5 times, she had a very traumatic past), he doesnt think rape is a thing and actively makes fun of it and anything relating to it, doesn't find anything wrong with domestic abuse despite the fact that that he saw me and my sister get physically abused by my dad until he was 7 years old (i was 12 at the time) and also knows about the horrific physical abuse my dad and his siblings went through as kids, openly slut shames and degrades women for no reason, and insults people with disabilities of all kinds and is openly racist (despite being mixed), believes the whole alpha male, men don't cry agenda and the list goes on.
but the worst thing, which really solidified my decision to not want to associate with him as soon as i get the chance as if everything else wasn't bad enough. i just heard him on the computer to his friends saying about how he was trying to sell something to this women (i have no idea but it sounded sketchy nonetheless) but she hadn't sent him the money so he suspected she was trying to scam him his words that followed was "she's a woman, she cant scam me i'll r\*pe her, i'll beat and r\*pe her, i'll pull down her knickers and i'll fucking r\*pe her if she tries to scam me". he said it so casually, and him and his friends were laughing, it made me sick to my stomach. i know of at least 3 women in our close family who have been r\*ped, one by a male family member and another by my dad's friend, the other by a stranger, i myself have been SA'd. hearing him say that is the most vile and sickening thing and i dont even think this is the worst he has said i just coincidentally happened to hear some of what he was saying this time.
hes a lost cause. there's nothing i can do, i've tried talking to him in so many different ways, he was raised by mostly women. he has been surrounded by strong women growing up. and yet he has turned into a monster. i don't care if this is "how the lads talk" or if its just jokes or its just a phase. its disgusting. my dad is 45 and even he never was never as bad as this, even i've had talks with him and hes changed his morals and ways of thinking. but my brother is never going to change, i am worried for who he is becoming, i'm scared for the women that will enter his life, i worry for any possible children he may have, im worried for what he might of already done, since i already know that he has at least shared compromising pictures of girls to his friend group. my mom doesnt help because she suddenly decided to become the doting mother me and my sister were missing when he turned 11 and started catering to his every need and is at his beck and call, reinforcing his mindset. part of me blames myself for not keeping a better eye on this but at the same time i'm not his parent i never have been, i know he has been influenced by other people. and i know i cant control him but i feel guilty. i just wish i could put a big warning sign over his head so other people know to avoid him. he's horrible and disgusting and i'm ashamed to call him my brother and i'm so glad im moving out in a week so i dont have to fall asleep listening to him and his friends spouting the vile shit they come out. any boys or men (the whole "only boys have this mentality" is ridiculous. men think like this to, they're dangerous and need to be held accountable and not infantilize them) and even women and girls do better, the world is trying to move on from this bull crap mentality for the betterment of everyone. if people having equal rights and wanted to be treated with the same basic human respect and decency that you would expect to receive yourself scares you so much then maybe you're the ones that need to stop being so sensitive and learn to deal with the reality of the world and catch up with the times. your mentality and ignorance has no place here. absolutely vile.
UPDATE: my dad spoke to him this morning, i don't know exactly what was said but he said my brother seemed to understand though didn't take it seriously and then claimed that he couldn't remember what he said last night or about who, but that he would be more careful in the future | My friends little brother says this type of shit on Xbox every fucking day with no consequence to his actions as all. Parents are fucking raising genuine monsters nowadays and it's concerning. |
(Nothing sexual actually happened but im using the flair just to be safe)
I (18m) work as a day camp counselor. The kids love pokemon, and they like me because pokemon is my favorite thing so i can keep up in a conversation with them. I work in the art group, and since not many kids signed up for art because everyone is on vacation, we only had 5 kids this week, all 5-8 years old.
Since the kids dont need much help with our topic this week, (model magic) my coworker and I have been coming up with stuff to do for the upcoming weeks and cleaning and whatnot, and we've been making our own art alongside the kids.
Pokemon is my favorite thing to draw so i've been doing that a lot. The kids love watching me draw since they love pokemon, and I've been taking requests. They dont know a lot of pokemon so i found a random generator and went through it with them until they found something they liked. A very quiet and shy 5yo girl (Lucy) saw one she liked and asked me to draw it, I instantly said yes because Lucy asking for something and stating her opinion is a huge breakthrough, thats how shy she is. She wanted Meloetta so i got to it while they made their model magic stuff. When i was done, she asked to take the drawing home, so i made copies for all the kids and they went home happy.
This morning I was waiting for the cars to start showing up, Lucy's car got there so i got ready to take her to our table, but her mother waved me over, so i handed Lucy off to my coworker and went to talk to her. Lucy's mom had never talked to me before, so i didn't know what to expect.
She asked me if i was Lucy's counselor, i said i was, and she started laying into me about how i let the devil into her precious baby's life, how pokemon is evil and magic is evil and since pokemon evolve and evolution wasnt real then it was the devil and that I shouldn't be around children. This is my first formal job ever, and this was the first time i got chewed out by a parent, so i was trying not to cry. Then she said something that really got me pissed. She brought out the P word.
At my job, the policy is that a sexual abuse accusation basically means you don't have a job anymore. We even have a rule where a counselor cant take a kid to the bathroom alone, there has to be two kids or more. If a kid tells someone 'A counselor touched me in the bathroom' thats it, you're gone. Totally understandable, better to be safe than sorry. So this witch calling me a fucking PEDOPHILE really got me mad, especially since i didn't understand why she was saying it. I asked why, she scoffed like it was obvious, and took out the drawing i made for Lucy yesterday and said,
"This little harlot is wearing the skimpiest dress i'd ever seen! Are you teaching my child this sort of devil worship is okay? Where's your boss? I want to talk to her!"
I was using google images as a reference. If you look up 'Meloetta' the first result is 1:1 what i drew. There's no sexual connotations at all. Sure, Meloetta's dress could be considered small, but its a small pokemon.
My boss saw i was having trouble and came over, told me to go back to the kids and that she would talk to me later. When she did, she explained that she asked Lucy, her friends, and my coworker what had happened, they said I was just drawing them a picture. Apparently there have been a lot of unreasonable complaints from the mother about this sort of thing and my boss is fed up. She said I didn't do anything wrong and that she would deal with it. I'm most likely not in danger of losing my job since Lucy herself didn't come forward with anything, and her mother was just calling me a pedophile with no basis but the drawing.
I feel terrible for Lucy. Yesterday she was so bright and happy playing with her friends and making animals out of clay, and her face lit up when i gave her the drawing. Today she seemed very out of it, she didn't seem to want to be around me, and didn't want to play with her friends. She was just sitting there and didn't want to participate in anything all day. It's so fucking heartbreaking. I thought i was doing great getting her to come out of her shell, and it feels like all that progress was ripped away over something so stupid.
I was in a similar situation when I was little, (grandma was a jehovahs witness and believed the same thing about pokemon) so I think i can guess what happened at home. Lucy probably showed her mom the drawing and she went off about how pokemon is the devil and she can't allow the devil into her soul, scaring the shit out of her in the process. She must have asked who drew it and got my name that way.
I'm not a fan of religion, but it's the mother's right to not want her child to be around certain things, but she could have been less of a bitch about it. She could have just said, 'our religion doesn't allow pokemon' and it would have been fine. But no, she had to start throwing around the pedo accusation.
I'm not sure if it was my fault because even though I think that believing pokemon is the devil is ridiculous, I don't want to disrespect anyone's religion. But she could have kept Lucy out of it, she's only 5. She doesn't understand what's going on. I still feel like it's my fault.
I could have dealt with it all just fine if that SOB didn't accuse me of being the most disgusting, vile thing a person could possibly be. It really, really hurts. | Do you think, maybe that the reason why Lucy is shy, is because the mother is a nuisance/trouble maker? My bet is that any time Lucy shows an interest in something, the mother tries to ruin it.
Be you and be proud. You have given that child (and probably others) many moments of happiness that they otherwise probably won't at home. |
hi reddit. i feel very upset right now. my boyfriend (we were only official according to him though, i wasnt sure) just casually told me the sex we had, which wasn't much (i was a virgin too) was bad. he knows how insecure i am about this and myself in general and how scared i am he will go back to his ex he still talked to and had a fwb relationship with not too long ago. we are on the verge of breaking up. am i in the wrong? this really hurt me, not being good enough was my biggest concern. what do i do? | You can find someone better than that guy |
I may sound like a psychopath but I know I am not and it's completely fair for me to think that.
My father used to beat me since I was 5 (5 is the youngest memory of mine)
I got beaten as a 5 year old for spilling things, for not eating food, even for crying when I got hurt.
I got shouted at for absolutely anything I would do.
He would shout at my mom and sometimes hit her.
He would beat me and shout at me and on top of that would act like he doesn't and wants me to act like it's nothing.
He mocks me for being skinny made fun of me cause I walk a little different.
He hits me and says that it's perfectly fine it made me think it was normal until years later I am 15 and My teacher talking about it made me realise it wasn't.
He thinks he is so intelligent but he is a funking moron. When I point out he is wrong he should at me and sometimes hits me.
About 2 years ago he beat me up because I was using my phone. He broke my phone and I had to lock myself in the bathroom. And he wanted to make me think I was wrong.
He even laughs while talking about that day. It freaks me out. How i was in the bathroom scared and crying.
On top of that he says that "he loves me"
And still shouts at me every so often.
He thinks that I am an idiot and will forgive him.
One day i will make him pay and he will look back at what he did but I won't let him be sorry I will make him pay.
He talks about how he his so very good and a religious icon or something. He is a fucking moron. He wants people to think how we should beat children and that it was normal back in the old times.
I wish I can have children and be a good father for them.
He is a horrible person and there is nothing I wouldn't do to have someone kill him for me.
A doctor asked if I am stressed but he doesn't want me to tell that I am because of him.
He told him "hE has ExAmS sO hE iS sTrEsSeD"
He is a pathetic loser I wish I was brave enough to finish all this by my own hands. | This is reactive abuse. You aren't a psychopath, this is just your survival circuit becoming the monster to fight the monster. I encourage you to get out of there as soon as you can, go no contact, and begin slowly healing.
If you don't create a strong boundary, you will fall into the "groove" of your generational trauma, and you will become more and more that which you hate. |
I went back into my history and deleted a bunch of comments with identifying information so thanks for helping me clean up my account, but my question is, why did you scroll like 100 comments back to shit on me in a post about my job thinking you’re some kind of detective?
My workload changed although I shouldn’t need to explain that to you, “Darth Mom.” Go take care of your children instead of annoying me, thanks. | It really sucks that you have to go through this, I'm just going to say whoever is stalking you is a jerk and should leave you alone. |
I have a red Canada hat I bought in Toronto a few years ago but It looks like a Maga hat from afar and I don’t want to wear it. Anyone else pissed about red hats being ruined forever? | I ain't going to lie, I see a red hat, I'm always double checking to see if is a MAGA hat. Unfortunately symbols meanings change over time. |
Tried commenting in r/reddeadredemption2 and learned that you’re not allowed to post there if you don’t have karma on other subreddits. That pissed me off, because I joined Reddit *just* to join that subreddit, and now I have to waste time posting in other subreddits that I don’t want to be a part of
Edit: Absolutely blew the Karma requirement out of the water, thank you all so much! 😃 | Good luck on your karma journey ! |
I need to vent in a safe, non judgmental place. I met this guy online after being in an 11 year relationship/ 8 year marriage. I was with my husband since I was 16.
I guess I just wanted to feel something. It’s been so long since I’ve felt something. My husband cheated on me our whole relationship. I meet this guy on Facebook dating. I go on a date with him and he’s so charming, sexy, everything a girl could want. I slept with him the second time we met. I’ve been sleeping with him for a month now.
Lately he’s been bread crumbing me. I’m pretty sure I just found his live in girl friend who is only 17 years old. (She posted his arm with his tattoos, saying they are 13 years apart. He’s 30 and she looks super young, no way she’s 43).
I’ve been having unprotected sex with him and I just feel disgusted. It looks like they’ve been together for a year. So he’s been with an underage girl?! I’m disgusted. The even worse part is I’m late on my period. I thought this man was someone else. I guess I can say I’ve learned my lesson but damn does it hurt. I give up on love. Maybe I’m self sabotaging because why in my right mind would I fall for someone in under a month? I’m so upset. Do I confront him or just block him? I really, really, liked him. I’m glad I know but I’m also mad at myself for snooping I guess.
| If you want my honest, harsh opinion... Dump him. He's using you for something (the sex, maybe?) and he's also having a very gross (and illegal, depending on where you are located) relationship with a minor.
I know it hurts, but you'll be better off without a trashy, classless man like that. If you are pregnant, take it one day at a time until you figure out what the best choice is for YOU, but don't stick around for the sake of the child. |
This might sound silly and privileged, to have a problem like this and be so focused on it, but i absolutely hate how small my breasts are.
I can't exactly describe how i hate it. I feel like it's not external, as i'm rather confident in my looks, even though i'm not conventionally attractive i feel alright with who i am inside and out, i don't care about other people's opinion or preferences, and other than that i somewhat like my body, and even the things i dislike can be changed (with exercise and a proper diet, etc...)
I came to peace with everything regarding my body except my breast size. Everytime i see them i feel ashamed and disgusted because they are so small.
They ruin so many outfits. Everytime i go to shop online, every single shirt is showcased on a model with bigger breasts and it makes me feel so odd and sad. I know i won't achieve that look- not to mention that i have no idea how the shirt or dress would look on me because none of these models look like me. And even when i type in things like "petite" or some shit, many of the results don't even match. And it makes me feel different, less than the average, because apparently the "default" is a bigger cup than mine. and even in most stores, the manequinns have at least something. I'm literally the size of an apple if not smaller. No manequinn ever has that.
My body shape would look sooo much better if i was even just a little bit more top heavy. I have bigger hips, somewhat narrow waist, but my ribcage is wide and my torso is long- if i had bigger breasts it would balance out, but my body just looks weird without it.
I could offer much more to a potential partner if i had bigger breasts.
They make me feel childish and immature. Like i am not developed enough. I feel like i am being judged by other women who have bigger breasts.
Not to mention in media it's always the punchline. The woman with smaller breasts is never content with herself. She is always jealous of the one who has a fuller chest. She is always ridiculed. Never chosen. It makes me feel like i should be ashamed of myself.
And i don't know what to do. I literally cry about this if i think about it on a bad day. Everytime i see my breasts it fills me with sadness. I just want to live in peace.
I really don't want plastic surgery or anything similar but i feel like it's the only way to like myself. Breasts can't grow naturally so i can't do anything about it other than pay someone to put some silicone crap inside my body. I hate it. | I love my small chest for many reasons!
1/ Exercising, moving is so easyyy
2/It feels very light and graceful and I can't imagine how painful big breasts could be for the back
3/Don't have to wear bras/Bras are too big, so I live with sports bra or bralettes
You really should think about some good aspects to cheer you up at least, because sometimes you could feel inferior but that's not true! Hyperfixating on this aspect is a waste of time and energy. |
I was in a coffee shop with a friend wearing a Slipknot shirt. The woman barista who obviously likes the band said to me "I like your shirt" and I say "Thanks" and went about my day. That's it.. nothing more.
Then I start getting lectured by my friend that I should of talked to her more about it and shoot my shot. Despite there was a queue behind me and she was busy. Plus I work in retail myself and when customers wear shirts of bands I like (man or woman) I tell them I like their shirt. Doesn't mean I want to be their friends or hang outside of work with them or date them. That's ridiculous
I'm so tired of friends telling me that just because a woman in service job shows me politeness that I'm in there. They work in service.. they're supposed to be polite to me. | And don't they have a little tip jar next to the register? Or at least an option on the pay screen thing? Connecting with customers = larger tips. That's factual. |
she denies that she cheated, but is too stupid to understand that emotional cheating is a thing. i fucking hate cheaters.
now they’re as happy as can be dating each other, my “best friend” who turned out to be a backstabbing cunt. i fucking hate them both and wish the worst for them both.
cheaters are the scum of the earth. backstabbers are also the scum of the earth. if you can’t be loyal to someone then you’re worth nothing.
fuck cheaters. and fuck both of them especially. | how did she emotionally cheat if you dont mind me asking? |
I’m going to be blunt, I have a chronic mental illness. I’ve also attempted suicide before. Everyone is always all about getting you help but when you actually do the insurance company slaps you across the face! I told my boss about it and how much it’s costing and he had the audacity to look me in the eyes and say “it’s actually very affordable.” Well sir it’s affordable for you and your Mercedes but some of us are classified as “working poor”. At this point the way I see it, it’s just more affordable to be dead. Sorry for the morbid outlook but triple digit payment for 1 session?! Utter bullshit and people wonder why nobody ever gets help, they can’t afford it!!! | if someone told me “it’s very affordable” i’d have slapped them across the face tbh like how fucking out of touch and disrespectful can you be? not all of us have the luxury of getting a six figure salary |
I don’t care what it is, just please comment something. Just drop a small comment. Whenever I post something, I don’t get much comments. | this happens to me too most of the time when I vent, it really makes me feel lonely. but don't worry! You're still an amazing person no matter what amount of fame out have. have a wonderful day :\] |
Turned out to be trash. Stick with what you know. Cheap mustard. | Thats one of the biggest disappointments man. |
IT'S LIKE A GOD DAMN THING THAT ALWAYS FOLLOWS YOU, AND YOU CAN'T GET AWAY WITH IT OR ESCAPE IT. IT WILL ALWAYS BE THERE WITH YOU, JUST LIKE YOUR DEBTS, DEBTS THAY YOU CAN'T FUCKING PAY OFF! HELL, I CAN'T EVEN POST IN MOST SUBREDDITS ANYMORE BECAUSE OF THIS FUCKING SYSTEM. THIS IS WHY I NEVER EVER EVEN POST THAT MUCH ANYMORE. FUCK YOU REDDIT. YOUR SYSTEM IS SHIT!
Edit: Thank you, everyone, for the upvotes, you didn't need to but you did. Someone gave me gold, which is entirely unnecessary, but I am very grateful for this. I can finally post in some subreddits because I have my karma balanced. I thought this post was just going to get lost, not be discussed, or get a million upvotes... Thank you!!! | Hey I don’t know if this is light hearted but don’t take this stuff too seriously they’re just fake internet points :)
But u have my updoot |
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